Page 126 of Abundance of Obsession

Her ragged breathing becomes mine as well. I have to help her!

Lying down next to Zoe, I pull her nightmare-trapped body close to me. Her head lands on my chest, and I hold her tight.

“Shhh… I’m here, sweetheart. Listen to my heart. It beats for you. You’re safe when you hear it. You’re in no danger,” I whisper, hoping the words reach her soul. Stroking her hair, I keep talking.

“Feel my touch; let it soothe you. Smell my scent. It’s familiar. It’s safe. Just like you. Sleep peacefully, my little one. I’ll watch over you. I won’t let anything bad happen to you. And I love you so, so much. It’s in every cell of my body, in every inch of my veins. How is it possible that you entered me as if into your own home? You made yourself at home in a man who didn’t believe in love. And now… Now he can’t and won’t live without you. I have no idea, but I thank you for it every minute. Let me be your home too, a peaceful and safe haven. I’ll be your support. I’ll be whatever you need. You’re safe in my arms. Sleep, my Raven.”

Somewhere in the middle of my words, Zoe’s body stops fighting the demons and she calms down.

The first three days after that incident are the hardest. On the surface, Zoe seems calm, composed, even cold. The truth creeps out at night when her deepest fears come to the surface. That’s when she needs me most, when that facade of composure crumbles.

And I don’t leave her side for a second.

Locked in her apartment like in a bubble, I try to help her. To heal her.

Every single day, I suffer because I can’t erase those events from her memory. Every scream of hers is like a dagger. Every sob twists my heart. And yet, I would rather suffer a thousand times more just so she could find relief.

And even though I know it will take time, even though I’m not entirely sure if it’s working, I try to be there for her.

“Eli, I think I need to get some tests done,” Zoe says on the fourth day after I finally persuade her to eat at least a croissant for breakfast.

“Have you decided to press charges?”

Zoe shakes her head. Her face is pale, and she has dark circles under the eyes from hard nights. I’m so damn worried about her.

“No, that’s not it. It’s about STDs.” She bites her lower lip, afraid to say it out loud. My hand closes around her small one, and I stroke her knuckles. Finally, she takes a deep breath. “He didn’t use protection. I need to make sure I’m not…”

She doesn’t have to finish; I know what she means.

“Sure, of course,” I say. “Do you want me to make an appointment for us today? Or would you rather wait a day or two?”

“I don’t want to wait. This is the right time, just like any other.”

Zoe’s eyes are slightly misty; her gaze isn’t as open as it used to be. It’s understandable.

Safety and love. That’s what I promise myself I’ll give her every day for the rest of my life.

“No problem, sweetheart. Leave it to me. I’ll take care of everything and we’ll go.”

“Will you go there with me?” she asks, surprised.

“If you didn’t want to go with me, I’d go after you. I want to be there for you.”

At my words, a smile blooms on her face. It’s really small, shy, but that’s enough for me right now.

When we receive the test results, our hearts feel lighter.

“That’s good. That’s very good,” she comments, seeing in black and white that she’s clean.

More days pass.

Ryker and Theo are worried, but they try not to push. I give all the instructions over the phone. They don’t comment on my strange behavior or the orders I’m issuing from my position as the Pact’s highest-ranking general.

“Don’t you have to go back to work?” Zoe asks one day. “You know, you don’t have to babysit me. I’ll be fine if you go for a few hours to do what you need to do.”

I study her face, every detail, and analyze it. Is she sick of me already? Maybe she doesn’t know how to tell me that? Or maybe I’m doing something wrong? Is what I’m doing actually helping her?

“Don’t look at me like that,” she adds with a slight smile.