Page 6 of Yes Now Yes Forever

Was it even possible for me to move past this and create a new life with my pack?

I snuggled my face against my faithful, lifelong companion, took a deep breath, and forced myself to get up off the bed and rearrange the books like I’d planned.

One thing I knew was I wouldn’t allow myself to give up on living like my mother had. Even if it took everything in me, I planned to fight for whatever future was out there for me.

“No, don’t do this, Mother,” I cried out as I jolted awake.

My chest was heaving as adrenaline coursed through my veins, and the nightmare dissipated. I raised a hand to wipe the tears off my face, trying to remind myself that none of it had been real.

“I am safe,” I whispered, then took a few deep breaths grounding myself. “I’m in my room in the home I share with my pack. They are all safe and sleeping in their rooms. What I remembered happened a long time ago and I survived.”

Finally, my heart rate calmed to the point I didn’t think it would burst out of my chest. Absently, I rubbed my chest in an effort to soothe myself further, but I knew I wasn’t going back to sleep right away. Resigned to that reality, I tossed back the covers and slipped my silk robe over my nightgown. Tonight was the first night none of the guys slept with me. Since I was meeting with Dr. Mann later today, I wanted to know how bad my nightmares were. Which meant I couldn’t have them stay since I knew they helped to keep me calm.

On silent feet, I started down the stairs, heading for the kitchen. A cup of hot chamomile tea was the best thing to settle my nerves after a nightmare this bad. Once I reached the second floor, I walked down the hall past Eli’s open bedroom door. I paused, then peeked in, only to find the bed empty and perfectly made. He must have chosen to spend the night with Fawn, which had me smiling. Recently, I’d felt like, with everything that happened, my whole pack had been so focused on taking care of me they didn’t have much time for their other relationships within our pack.

Continuing down the hall toward the final set of stairs to the main floor, I was brought to a halt by the sound of a man groaning loudly. The fear and anxiety I’d tried to quell since waking roared to life. Before I could take a second to consider that what I heard wasn’t a man in pain, I forcefully shoved open the door to Tanner’s room. The door had been shut but not latched, and with the power I put behind my hand, it slammed against the wall with a loud boom just as I flipped on the lights.

There before me, looking completely startled, was a naked Zachary sitting on the end of the bed, with an equally naked Tanner on his lap. I then realized Zachary was holding Tanner’s legs up, cradling his lover against his chest, so they could easily watch in the full-length mirror as Zachary thrust balls deep into Tanner’s ass.

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry,” I blurted as I turned on my heel and slapped at the light switch to darken the room before bolting out.

“Shit,” Tanner swore, which was quickly followed by a moan, and the sound of someone running after me.

Just as I was about to reach the stairs, a hand wrapped around my wrist and tugged me back. The next thing I knew, I was wrapped up in a pair of strong arms and engulfed in Tanner’s sweet, smokey scent. Still trapped in flight mode, I went rigid, bracing my hands on his chest as if I were going to push him away. Sensing my distress, Tanner purred and gently nuzzled his cheek against my head in an effort to soothe me. After a few heartbeats, my body relaxed, and I hugged him tightly.

“You’re all right, starlight,” Tanner murmured and dropped a kiss on my head before pulling me away from him slightly so he could see my face. He didn’t say anything right away. Instead, he searched my gaze with his warm brown eyes.

“Everything okay?” Zachary asked, his deep voice breaking the silence.

Tanner glanced over at his lover and then back to me. “Not sure, but seeing as it’s two in the morning, I’m going to take a guess and say it might have been a nightmare.” Dropping my gaze, I nodded and gasped as Tanner scooped me into a bridal hold. “I think it might be better if we take this conversation back to my room where I don’t have to worry about the fact I’m only wearing my birthday suit.”

“I wouldn’t be worried, it’s a great view,” Zachary chuckled, giving us a wink.

“Says the man who took the time to pull his boxers on,” Tanner countered. Zachary started to say something, but Tanner leaned in and soundly kissed the Alpha. “I’m teasing you, yah grumpy bear.”

Zachary grunted and slapped Tanner’s bare ass urging the man forward back to his room. Without a second thought, Tanner climbed right back on his bed and settled me in his lap. Zachary sat in front of us so his knees touched Tanner’s and blocked my escape, not that I was planning on running now that I’d calmed down.

“First thing I want to know is if you’re all right,” Zachary asked, his gaze locked with mine, making it clear he expected an answer.

I took a second to wet my lips before answering, “I’m fine, nothing happened.”

Zachary’s brow arched as he gave me a look that told me he didn’t believe a word I said. “Honey bear, I think our definition of fine might be different. You burst into the room as if a pack of wolves were on your heels and left roughly the same way. Neither of us is upset with you. As our Omega, you have every right to seek out your Alphas, no matter what we might be doing.”

“I thought Tanner was hurt,” I admitted, with a slight blush as I now knew he’d been moaning for quite the opposite reason.

Absently, I tucked my hair behind my ear as I dropped my gaze. “A nightmare woke me, so I headed to the kitchen to make some tea. It’s the only thing that seems to help me fall back asleep without needing to take a pill. As I passed by, I heard someone groan loudly as if they were in pain. My mind and body were still on high alert from my memories which led me to react on instinct.”

Tanner shifted me slightly to sit sideways on his lap, then cupped my jaw and urged me to look at him. “Starlight, there is nothing to be ashamed of in how you reacted. Actually, I kind of love that you felt protective enough over your pack to burst into my room even though you were scared of what you might find on the other side of the door. However, I wouldn’t be a good Alpha to you if I didn’t also admit I’m worried about the fact you had such an awful nightmare, and it had you on such high alert.”

As he talked, Tanner’s fingers stroked the outside of my thigh where my nightgown had gotten bunched up from the way he was holding me. The fact I was well aware he was naked didn’t help me as I tried to focus on what he was saying. Tanner didn’t ask me outright what my nightmare had been about, he wasn’t one to push if I wasn’t ready to talk about it. Yet I knew the thing he craved between us was for us to have a bond of trust where I would willingly share my thoughts and fears.

“This isn’t the first time I’ve had to deal with nightmares, they started after I woke up from the accident. They are worse right now as memories I’d forgotten have begun to surface. I plan to talk about it with Dr. Mann when I see her today, but I’m fairly certain I know what she’ll tell me to do,” I shared, trying to reassure my Alphas.

When it came to issues like this, there wasn’t much anyone could do. Nightmares and flashbacks were part of the healing process, and all sleeping pills ever did was trap me in those hellish moments, unable to wake up, which is why I preferred to forgo using them and stick with tea or other natural remedies.

“I don’t like the thought of not being able to do anything,” Tanner grumbled. “That being said, it helps to know you’re going to tell Dr. Mann about the problem. Who knows, she might have something new for you to try.”

Reaching out with both hands, I grasped Tanner’s face and pulled him down so I could kiss him. He was more than willing to give in to my demand, purring as the kiss deepened. I gasped as I felt Tanner’s cock harden under me. All I had to do was open my legs slightly to allow his cock to slide between my thighs so I could rub my pussy against it.