Page 9 of Knot Now Knot Ever

“You’re not the first person to mention it,” I admitted, scrubbing my face with my hands. “It doesn’t happen all the time… only when I’m nervous or intimidated, and typically if the person is an Alpha.”

“Do I intimidate you or make you feel nervous?” Eli pressed, and his voice wavered ever so slightly.

Tilting my head, I looked at the man sitting there dressed in a pair of mundane gray sweats. His hair wasn’t styled, and he had a five o’clock shadow—by any right, he shouldn’t have been intimidating. Yet confidence rolled off him like mist on a mountain demanding respect from anyone who dared to confront it.

“Intimidate isn’t the right word, but yes, you make me nervous. Although I doubt it’s for the reasons you’re used to,” I answered. “Please don’t take this the wrong way, and trust I have a logical reason to support this frame of thought. I never wanted to meet my scent match or matches, so much so that I refused to give my information to the Scent Matchers when my designation was revealed. Yet there you sit, and I’m at a loss of what to do now.”

Eli nodded and stood, then began to rub his chin absently as he paced the room, clearly deep in thought. My heart ached for him, imagining what it must be like to find out your Omega never wanted to be found or part of your life. Even saying it out loud made me feel like the biggest asshole in the world, but he deserved to know the truth.

Clara entered the room a few minutes later, pushing a wheelchair. “Time for your CT scan.”

I stood and looked at Eli. “If you’re not here when I get back, I’ll understand, and we’ll go our separate ways with no hard feelings.”

Eli stalked up to me, caught my face with both his hands, and kissed me like I’d never been kissed before. The world stood still, and for a moment, nothing mattered but the man whose scent and commanding presence were leaving his mark on my soul.

If this is all I had to remember him by, it would be enough.

It had to be.

Any more, and I would be addicted.

“I made a vow that I would never leave you, and I fully intend to keep it in this life and the next,” Eli announced. “You might not have wanted me in your life, but I plan to do whatever it takes to change your mind.”

Waiting for the results took longer than the test, but I was discharged once Dr. Gilmore assured Eli everything was fine. Per hospital policy, I was wheeled out to the main entrance, where I was finally able to use my own two damn feet. The clothes I came in wearing were in a clear plastic bag, and that was all the possessions I had with me. In my crazed mad dash, I’d left my shoes, purse, phone, and key back at the office.

Eli stood beside me, the ever-present guardian, making sure everyone was giving me the respect and care he believed I deserved. Unsure what I was going to do to get home, I fidgeted next to him until a man wearing a vest marking him as a valet jogged up to Eli.

“Here are your keys, sir,” the valet said, offering a fancy-looking key fob.

“Thank you. Did the person who dropped it off leave anything with you?” Eli asked, slipping the man some cash.

He nodded and pointed to the back of the car. “Put it in the trunk so no one would see stuff sitting in the back seat.”

With the grace of a king, Eli nodded to the valet and placed a hand low on my back. “Come on, let’s get you home, Lyra.”

Unable to fight against his touch, I let him usher me to the luxury car I knew cost what some people made in a year. “Wait,” I blurted, putting on the brakes as he opened the passenger door.

My eyes were glued to the black leather seat waiting for me. I could feel my heart rate climbing and the tingle on the back of my neck telling me not to get any closer.

Twisting to face Eli and putting my back to the car, I clung to my bag of clothes. “I just remembered, I need to go back to the office to get my things. Without my purse, I don’t have the keys to get into my apartment.”

“It’s been taken care of,” Eli assured and gestured for me to get in.

I looked at the seat then back at him, anxiety building by the second. If I didn’t find a way out of this now, I was going to have a full-blown panic attack again. “I-I can’t.”

“All that I’m asking is for you to let me take you home. It will put me at ease to know you’re there and safe. In no way is this intended to pressure you into anything else,” Eli explained, thinking I was trying to push him away again.

Shaking my head, I looked down at the ground, letting my hair fall like a shield in front of my face. “It’s not that,” I whispered, silently pleading for him to let me find my way home. “You’ve done so much for me already. I’m fine to take the bus. I shouldn’t take up more of your time, and I doubt you slept well.”

Fingers caressed my cheek as he tucked hair behind my ear, then tucked under my chin, urging me to look at him. “Lyra, no matter what happens between us, I will only enforce one rule. Don’t. Lie. To. Me. I don’t care if you’re pissed and end up chewing my ass out over something, but I won’t stand to be lied to, not by anyone.”

Fear clawed at me, causing my body to shake like a leaf as tears welled up and burned in my eyes. “Not the front seat,” I choked out. “I can’t… I can’t do it. Please don’t make me.”

Realization flashed in his icy-blue gaze, and instantly, I was wrapped in a tight hug, grounding me to the here and now. My emotions and fears from everything that happened last night were too close to the surface. Normally, I would have been able to find a way out of sitting in the front seat that didn’t draw attention to my biggest secret. Most people in my life never thought twice about the fact I didn’t drive, especially when my whole pack worked together and carpooled. Otherwise, I would take public transportation or a car service where I could freely sit in the back without a second thought.

It was these moments when I was forced to bear my scars to another person that had me keeping my distance from people. I had many acquaintances and work friends, but they were all surface-level connections. Once I left Rockton, none of them had reached out to see how I was, and that was fine with me. The fewer chances people had to see the real Lyra Clark, the better. I hadn’t been joking when I said that to Eli. No one wants to be friends with someone who’s as much work as I am to be around.

“It’s okay, Lyra. I’m not going to make you do anything that scares you,” Eli whispered into my hair. “Is the back seat more comfortable for you?”