Page 12 of Blood & Heartache

With all the bits covered and my bladder no longer threatening its betrayal so early in the morning, I took a deep breath and opened the door. Luca was leaning on the wall right next to the door, meaning he’d heard everything that just went on. Great.

“It’s way too fucking early for this.” I groaned, then attempted to walk the four steps to the sink. I made it one before a strong arm wrapped around my waist. “If you pick me up, Luca, I’ll fucking stab you with my toothbrush.”

“Easy on the threats. I’m just helping you take some weight off your leg,” he assured me. “No reason to go all Prison Break on my ass.”

“Oh, the toothbrush wouldn’t be sharpened, but it would still hurt like hell,” I informed him. “I wouldn’t want to give you the satisfaction of being a martyr for the cause. The other guys would rally behind you, and I can’t have that.”

“You always so cheerful in the morning?” Luca asked, meeting my gaze in the mirror with a quirked brow.

I flashed him a bright smile. “One of my best qualities. Ask Braxton what it’s like to wake me up when I’m not a walking wounded.”

Luca grunted and gave me a little more space but kept his hands on my hips. I rolled my eyes, knowing that no matter what I did or threatened, he wasn’t going to leave. The best course of action now was to do what I needed and allow them to get to a place they felt comfortable to leave me alone for a bit. It was odd to wake up with someone—correction, two someones—in my bed. Now here, one of them was acting like this domestic bliss was normal for us when I’d only known the man for about twoish weeks. The truly strange part was while I wasn’t used to it and would never admit to it, I kind of liked it. Waking up had been blissful until the shock of it all came into play. Had I been missing out on not taking advantage of sleepovers? I paused in my brushing a moment then snorted. Yeah, right. None of the guys I’d hooked up with would have been down to cuddle, but then again, that’s why I picked them.

“Do I even want to ask what’s going on in that wickedly smart brain of yours right now?” Luca inquired.

Taking a moment to spit and rinse before I twisted to face him, I smirked. “Depends… how would you feel if I was thinking about the other guys I’d woken up to?”

Pulling a move that was far more Braxton’s style, he booped me on the nose before scooping me up again. “Sorry, Ace, but I don’t believe for a second you’ve ever let someone sleep in your bed. That would require far too much trust from you that you aren’t willing to give.”

I thought about arguing with him, but out of all the men who’d become my lieutenants, Luca was the only one who understood my caution. Since the moment I met them, I’ve been watching and observing, learning all I could. If these men were supposed to have my back, I needed to trust they would be there to protect it. Luca had been cold and distant, but I knew it for what it was, having used it most of my life—a defense mechanism. He and I had reached an understanding during the first meeting when he asked if I’d really kill one of them if I thought they would betray me. I reached deep down and let the darkness shine through, only to be greeted by his own.

Returning to the bed, I found Atticus awake, fully dressed, but blurry-eyed. The poor guy looked like he’d been through hell, making me extremely curious as to what exactly went down last night. It was glaringly obvious something happened or neither of them would be here in my room otherwise. Once I was set on the giant mattress Daddy decided I needed, I scooched my way to the headboard.

“So who wants to fill me in on what went down?” I asked, then held up a hand. “Wait, can one of you call down to have coffee sent up or hand me my phone so I can do it?”

Luca walked over to the phone on my nightstand and made the call, so I turned my attention to Atticus. “The last thing I remember is us watching MythBusters, and I’d like to point out I knew you’d like the show.”

“May I sit?” Atticus asked from where he stood at the foot of the bed.

“Why are you asking to sit when I woke up with you in my bed? Yes, please. You look like you didn’t sleep at all,” I assured him.

Walking around the foot of the bed, he sat closer to where I was but still seemed stiff and uncomfortable. “I’m asking because last night I didn’t. You had a nightmare, and I couldn’t wake you or get you to calm down. Once I realized I wasn’t equipped to help you, I called Ryker, and he decided to bring Luca into the matter. I also wish to point out I’m extremely uncomfortable that we changed you, but please know we did it with the utmost care and respect.”

It would seem many of Atty’s boundaries were stretched last night. Now it made sense why he was so flustered and anxious.

“Atty, I appreciate all you did last night to take care of me. I’m sorry I put you in such a position, but please know I’m not upset or worried that you did something I wouldn’t have approved of. You and I are good, so don’t dwell on it anymore,” I assured him. Reaching out to put my hand over his, I looked into his worried blue eyes behind those adorable round glasses. “Thank you for being a wonderful friend and looking after me.”

The rigidness of his body relaxed, and he let out a sigh like he’d been holding his breath. “You’re welcome, Astin. I just wish there was more I could have done, but it would seem only Luca has the key to getting you out of your nightmares.”

That took me by surprise. “Does he?” I commented, locking eyes with the man. “What, pray tell, would that be?”

Luca stood, hands in the pockets of his sweatpants, looking as if he belonged in my bedroom, and it wasn’t the first time he’d been in it. “Your father called me before we dealt with things at the warehouse. He told me briefly about a situation that happened during your training.”

“You mean the fact I was so brutally tortured and trained in the name of ensuring I could survive anything thrown at me?” I inquired, tapping a finger on my chin. “Or do you mean as a result of that merciless behavior, I developed a rather deadly coping mechanism? I like to call it the Darkness.”

Both men gave me surprised looks.

“Yes, to both those things,” Luca confirmed. “With that knowledge, he also gave me a trigger phrase that’s supposed to snap you back to yourself if the Darkness takes over.”

“So that’s how they managed to deal with the nasty bitch,” I mused aloud. “I was never sure what exactly they did when the fourth therapist they set me up with wouldn’t tell me what his specialty was. Guess he was a hypnotist or something if he could pull off something like that. So I’m guessing you used the phrase to get me out of my nightmare?”

Luca nodded, watching me with a curious expression. “Your father believed you had no idea about this matter. He’d been told that you would forget everything that happened.”

“Until I start having nightmares. Then I get to relive all those pesky memories that have been trapped inside me for years. They get worse when I’ve had an episode, and the Darkness comes into play,” I shared. “I’d hoped not being alone would make a difference, but it would seem that wasn’t the case. Yet I feel so much more rested today.”

Luca shifted his stance and scratched at his neck, drawing my attention to the numerous tattoos that flowed across his body. He was like a walking piece of artwork that you could stare at forever and keep finding some new detail. God, I really needed to get fucking laid if a tattooed man’s chest was getting me all hot and bothered.

“I have a theory on that,” Luca said, causing me to pull my eyes from his abs to meet his amber eyes. His lips twitched with a grin, and a knowing look told me he’d known what I was doing. “When you have these nightmares, reliving the memories, it traps you in them just like you're trapped when the Darkness takes over. The moment I used the phrase, you calmed and fell into an almost coma-like state. The trauma your body had been living through had worn you out so that you slept deeply. If I hadn’t been able to pull you out, there’s no telling how long you’d have been subjected to those memories.”