Page 63 of Escape to the Sun

‘Status?’ he said, opting for action over niceties.

‘Where’s your radio?’ Tim said.

‘It’s—’ Louis felt for it on his belt, realised it wasn’t in its customary slot and faltered.

‘Told you, didn’t I?’ Tim said to the room, and Louis felt adrift again.

‘What is it?’ he said, searching the assembled officers for an answer.

‘There was a fire in one of the engine rooms,’ Tim said, clearly enjoying Louis being on the back foot.

Fire on board any ship was one of the deepest fears for any sailor. To be stuck between burning or drowning was a terrifying choice. As a result, every conceivable effort was made on a ship such as the Ballygowan to eliminate the possibility. Rigorous fire safety checks and training were mandatory. But accidents were still possible.

‘What happened?’ he said.

‘It’s out, Louis,’ Maria said, frowning as she spoke. ‘They think it was a spark from some loose wiring. They were on it, though. It didn’t even set off the engine room alarms. They did good.’

‘Take me there,’ he said, grabbing a spare radio from a changing point and allowing Maria to lead the way.

Ruth hadn’t felt as energised for years. She struggled to pinpoint a Christmas Day she’d enjoyed more and both kids were buzzing. She might have cleaned out her bank account to finance this trip, but it had all been worth it.

She crept from the cabin, having stayed long enough to be sure both Millie and Nathan had crashed out and were fast asleep. There might have been a slight tinge of an alcohol-induced snore about Nathan’s breathing, after Ruth had also allowed him a glass of lager with dinner, but he wasn’t so inebriated she needed to worry about him.

Teddy was waiting for her in one of the late-night bars. They’d spent the evening together, managing to squeeze an extra place setting on the table she’d booked, and Nathan hadn’t even kicked off when the waiter assumed them to be a family group.

‘They’re asleep,’ she said by way of greeting, smiling at the glass of red waiting for her on the low table between the seats Teddy had requisitioned.

‘Cheers,’ he said, lifting his glass.

‘Cheers to you too.’ She slid into the chair, taking a large mouthful of ‘Mrs Claus’ Merlot’ and resting her head back. ‘What an epic day.’

‘Agreed.’

Ruth glanced across. They hadn’t had a chance to talk about anything to do with Louis, or anything else for that matter, while they were at dinner – hardly anyone could get a word in with Millie supplying every single detail of their snorkelling trip. Any other space in the conversation was filled by Nathan, each sentence beginning with ‘Keisha says…’ Ruth had never been happier about being silent.

And yet important things remained to be discussed.

‘We didn’t get to talk about Louis,’ she said. ‘How did it go?’

Teddy nodded. ‘In essence I said what you suggested. I don’t know why I didn’t do it years ago.’

‘And how did he react?’

‘Happy to hear it, I think. Sometimes it’s hard to tell. Louis is good at turning to sarcasm rather than dealing with tough situations, and I’ve always been wound up by that.’

‘But he loves you. Bottom line. And you love him. So – what else matters?’

‘You make it sound so simple…’

‘Yes. And I know it’s anything but simple in practice, Ted. God, how well I know that. But there comes a point, doesn’t there, when it’s time to stop messing around and say it as it is?’

Teddy frowned, sipped at his drink and turned to face her. ‘Are you still talking about Louis?’

‘If you want.’

‘What do you want, Ruth?’

‘If you truly want to know, Teddy, it’s this. I want this.’ She gestured between the two of them, enough emotion contained in her motion to threaten to tip her glass as her fingers flicked against it. ‘I’m not saying I want it to be like we had before – I wouldn’t expect you to feel that way about me again, but this… being with you and spending time together. That’s what I want… It always has been.’