Page 173 of The Mistress of All & Torn

She turned to him, hesitant, and in doing so, her lips met his. Neither withdrew. He caressed her face and her neck, then she tasted the flavour of his mouth. She sighed, while an unknown bliss enveloped her.

“Take the reins,” he said again. “You only have to pull gently, and Thunder will understand what you wish. And use your legs to tell him to go faster. Press your legs into him. Your wish is his command. And mine.”

His hands brushed down from her thighs over her legs, to place them on the horse’s flank. His touch weakened her, burning her skin. A quiver shattered her, and she leant back until she pressed against his torso.

“Tell him,” Darcy whispered. He was determined to allow her to lead and control the horse, to control the way and the direction they both moved. She felt his intention, understood his meaning, and his gesture made her confident.

“Will you hold me? I am a little afraid.”

“I shall hold you. You must not fear—I shall not let you fall. But I trust your strength. You will conquer this.”

His hands encircled her waist, and she took the reins again. Hesitantly, she squeezed the horse with her legs, and Thunder moved forward. Darcy did not say a word.

Fearful at first, she pulled the reins right and left, until Thunder made a complete turn, then she led him to the shore. For a while, they walked steadily, while both Elizabeth and the stallion became accustomed to each other.

“He is so beautiful! And strong but gentle,” she exclaimed.

“He is as you wish him to be.”

They rode in silence for a while, then she suddenly pressed her legs into the horse, and he increased their pace. She held the reins tightly, her legs gripping the horse’s flanks, the wind in her face. The power she felt controlling such a powerful animal was intoxicating.

“I want to go faster,” Elizabeth declared.

“Do whatever you wish. As I said once, I would by no means suspend any pleasure of yours, Miss Bennet.”

She began to laugh aloud, openly joyful, free. Then she leant into the horse.

“Come, Thunder! Let us run!”

Instantly the stallion obeyed, and Elizabeth felt like they were flying.

Sitting in the arms of the man she loved, Elizabeth experienced the most blissful moments she could remember, witnessing and sharing his exultation. He gradually loosened the grip of his hands around her waist and withdrew back an inch, until their bodies did not touch. She was truly free, by herself, using her own strength. She did not need his support, but it was enough to know his protection was near.

Eventually, they arrived back at the bay, and Elizabeth stopped the horse at the place where they had previously met. It was very late, and they should have returned home long ago. But he had allowed her the power to decide and lead. And so she had.

“We should rest a little,” she proposed. “Thunder must be tired. Would you not agree?”

“Thunder is not tired, but a little rest would be welcome.” He dismounted and helped her down, then pulled a bottle of water from his saddle bag. He first offered it to Elizabeth. She thanked him and drank from the bottle, then he drank too, his lips touching the place where hers had been.

Elizabeth watched him, mesmerised. Each of his gestures showed more of his character, of his tenderness, of his caring and generous nature. Everything she had failed to see for so long.

“Should we sit?” He spread the blanket on the spot where she had once fallen asleep. But she walked towards the sea and remained standing there, still. He approached her.

“What do you want?” he asked.

“Do you know how much you have already done for me tonight? You have taught me to do what I thought I would never have the courage to attempt. I would have never done that with any other man.”

“May I call you Elizabeth? If only for tonight?”

“And I shall call you Fitzwilliam. Until dawn.”

She was the one who took his hands and brought them to her heart. Then she turned towards the sea and wrapped his arms around her. She was back in his embrace and did not want to leave. Not yet.

“Elizabeth…what I told you earlier, does that not change anything? At all?”

“What could it change, Fitzwilliam?”

“I know you would not break your promise, but I still pray for a miracle. Tonight, I tasted happiness, and I know I shall never feel it again without you, Elizabeth.”