Page 170 of The Mistress of All & Torn

She stared at him in disbelief. “You intended to stay here all night?”

“Yes. I even brought a blanket and some water,” he smiled, indicating the small bundle on the saddle.

“This is madness.”

“Not really. I could not sleep. I have not slept in many months.”

“What has happened?” she asked, licking her dry lips. The lump in her throat would not go away.

He glanced around, as if searching for unwanted eyes.

“I had a long conversation with Anne today.”

Yes, it was as she expected. They had set the wedding date. But why would he insist on telling her now, in the middle of the night?

“She is well, I hope?” was all she could say.

“She asked my permission to break the engagement and to marry Richard.”

Elizabeth stared at him in utter shock. She forgot to breathe and her heart pounded. What did he just say?

She swayed on her feet and leant against him, seeking support. He closed his arms around her protectively. For a moment, neither moved. The warmth of this first embrace enfolded them, intoxicated them.

She finally lifted her eyes to his face, and his stare was there, waiting for her.

“But why? How?” she asked, dumbfounded, finally separating from him. His hands were still holding her arms and she did not object.

“I was equally shocked, as I did not suspect anything of the kind. But I cannot pretend to have been attentive lately.”

“This is most unexpected. And what did you say? You must have been upset at such a request.”

“Upset? I was stunned. Then relieved,” Darcy admitted.

She took a few steps away from him and sat on the ground, under a tree. He joined her, his horse waiting patiently nearby.

“Last year, when I left Rosings, I was angry, unreasonable, offended, shocked. My temper has often betrayed me in the past, but I have usually managed to control it. That time I failed. When my aunt wrote to me that Anne was ill and that it was my fault, I returned. I spoke to Anne, and she begged me to take her to town as she was lonely and feared she would die without knowing anything of the world. But my aunt would not agree unless we were engaged to be married. And, since I had no other prospects and I believed I had ruined all my chances of happiness, I accepted.”

“So it was my fault?” she whispered.

“Your fault? Not at all! I was the only one to blame. Had I considered the situation more thoroughly, had I not allowed my wounded pride to lead my reasoning, had I been more patient, things would have been different now. Perhaps for both of us.”

The last words were barely comprehensible, and she lowered her eyes. She could not contradict him and agreeing on such a painful matter would only bring more grief.

“I knew Anne was not any more ready or willing to marry than I was. We prolonged the situation as long as possible, but Aunt Catherine persisted. She kept writing to us, and we have been expecting a visit from her. Anne and Richard were always easy with each other, but we all know him. Marrying Anne and becoming a loyal husband was rather unlikely.”

“Did you speak to the colonel? Forgive me, but I am worried about Anne. I would not wish to think she might be hurt.”

“Your affection for Anne is commendable, but it seems there is no reason for worry. My dear cousin is stronger and wiser than I believed her to be. She is certain that Richard will be a good, caring husband, that they will enjoy each other’s company, and she does not oppose his…occasional amusements with his old friends, as long as it does not harm their marriage and good name. I do not doubt any of these statements. He is an honourable man, and his affection for Anne is genuine.”

“So what will you do now?” she enquired, still astonished.

“They begged me to keep the secret, so only you and Georgiana know. Richard will come to town with me to apply for a special licence. It will be my testimony that I willingly release Anne from the engagement. Georgiana and Anne will come to London in a few days. And only then, when all is settled, shall we announce it to our families.”

“But is Anne well? What of her illness? What does the doctor say?”

He paused. “Anne has had a weak constitution since she was a child. We never knew what her illness truly was. But lately, she seems to have improved. Even her complexion proves that. The doctors are pleased with her progress, and the sea bathing has helped her significantly.”

“I did notice the same,” Elizabeth agreed. “If I had not previously known her, I would have assumed she was in good health.”