Page 130 of The Mistress of All & Torn

“No. But it is very grave. It is a matter that will affect the lives of many—and most of all, you. Something for which you might well hate me. Yet, I must speak to you nevertheless.”

“Please. And have no concern that I could ever hate you.”

“Very well, dear girl. As I said, there is nobody I trust more than you. Therefore, I put Philip’s life and mine into your hands.”

There was another long pause and more dark shadows crossed her ladyship’s face.

“We have known you for only a few months but we have come to admire and love you. To us, you are part of our family, and the days when we do not see you are gloomy and empty.”

“Thank you. Surely you know the feeling is mutual.” Elizabeth was equally emotional, intrigued, and concerned.

Lady Kendal had been pacing the room, then suddenly she stopped and smiled tentatively.

“I do know… I am asking you… I am begging you to become part of the family. Officially.”

Elizabeth’s heart started to race. She said nothing, as she felt like she had been thrown back into the past. Her ladyship continued, more restless, her speech rushed.

“I am proposing you marry Philip and accept the legacy that will come with this position. It is a favour that I am praying you will accept.”

Elizabeth listened, awestruck.

“I spoke to Dr Gordon last night. I fear we cannot hope for any improvement in Philip’s health. Quite the contrary, he might take a turn for the worse at any moment. I also have a weak heart—last night, it ached more than usual. I took it as a warning from God. My heart cannot take any more I am afraid. It has suffered too many losses, too much grief. I cannot bear more.”

“Dear Lord, I did not know. How are you feeling now?”

“I am as well as can be expected. The doctor will remain with us for a few more days.”

Elizabeth’s head was spinning. She could hardly comprehend all the disturbing information that closed around her like a cage.

“When we are gone, our entire fortune will be shared between distant relatives. There will be no hospitals, no schools, no charities to support. Everything will be lost. I need someone who has the will and the fortitude to continue my work and to help it grow. Someone caring and compassionate and clever. Someone able to manage our fortune to the benefit of many others. And trustworthy. To take care of either me or Philip—whoever should remain alone. Of course, you will have full command of the entire fortune. I expect you to arrange a good dowry for each of your sisters, to provide your family with all the comfort they wish. You will be Lady Alveston, the mistress of all, and will run everything to your liking. All decisions will belong to you. Everything will be yours.”

“Lady Kendal, this is… You should know that I shall always take care of you and Philip as long as you need me. I shall readily assume any responsibilities and will put every effort into your charities. I do not need to marry Philip to do so. I cannot… It would mean to deceive him. I do love him with all my heart but almost as a brother!”

“You would not need to deceive either of us, my dear. Both Philip and I know the nature of your affection for him. Believe me, there is no other way. You must have a legitimate right over the family’s fortune!”

Elizabeth was stunned, trembling, doubtful, while Lady Kendal continued.

“We both know how poor his health is. Philip could never be a true husband to a wife, so your kind of affection for him, and your generous loyalty, is precisely what we all need. With you, he would not feel ashamed, useless, or pitied. To others, your marriage will be perfectly legitimate. You will be Lady Alveston, his and my heiress.”

Despite the explanation, Elizabeth could offer no answer. She was trying to comprehend and to gather the strength to respond.

“My dear, I am asking you to sacrifice a few years of your life, for your family, for Philip and me, and for many others. I know I have no right to ask such a favour, but I have no choice either. You are our only salvation!”

“Forgive me, but I am lost. Your request astonishes me,” Elizabeth finally murmured.

“I can imagine. And I am certain the prospect of such a large fortune is not an inducement for you. You will be more overwhelmed by responsibilities than pleased to live in luxury.”

“Lady Kendal, does Philip know of our conversation?”

“We did talk about such a possibility. To him, it would fulfil a dream. He is completely bewitched by you—you must know that. Your company gives him peace and comfort. You give him liveliness and a desire to live. His face brightens when he sees you.”

“Oh…”

“Do not worry. He knows your affection for him is not of the passionate kind, although equally strong.”

“This is true. I admire and love him. I adore being with him. But as a close friend. Almost as a brother. It has nothing to do with his affliction. I would feel the same if he were healthy and strong. But then he would likely be surrounded by many young ladies more beautiful than me, and he would likely not have even noticed me,” she attempted to jest.

“I doubt that. Any man who has a little wit and common sense would recognise your worth. I understand the nature of your feelings is not affected by his health, but your decision must be! You must take these delicate circumstances into consideration. I am right to call it a sacrifice.”