Page 73 of Masters of Control

Q lifted his hand and raised a single figure salute to his cousin Daria. They were the closest in age among the cousins, which had led to them hanging out the most during the various holiday gatherings throughout the years. Back then, she’d been named Darren, but she’d made the transition in her early twenties and nothing had really changed between them except she had better advice than when she was a teenager.

Something he should probably take advantage of, now that he thought about it, but he didn’t know if he wanted advice.

It had been two days since his blow-up with Sam.

She’d texted him yesterday asking if they could talk. He’d been on his way down to his grandma’s and had texted her back that he was going to concentrate on his family for the next few days, and they could talk after he got back. He still needed time to cool down.

Time and maybe some sense knocked into him because he was already making excuses for her in his head. It was like he wanted to set himself up to be hurt again.

Third time’s the charm.

“Okay then, Scrooge.” Daria chuckled, sitting down on the porch swing next to him. This part of North Carolina wasn’t that much warmer than Maryland, so Q was bundled up in a coat and scarf, his hands stuffed in his pockets.

It was a cold Christmas day.

Or maybe he was just cold without Sam in his life.

“I don’t suppose you could take the hint and just let me hang out here on my own for a bit? Wouldn’t you rather spend Christmas day with your wife?” Q asked with a sigh, but there was no heat in his words. He wasn’t angry at Daria. He wasn’t even sure he was mad at Sam.

But he was disappointed. It was making it hard to enjoy Christmas and his family. A stark contrast to Thanksgiving.

“No can do. Unless you want the moms out here next. I’m the compromise. Rashida understands. She’s gonna keep them occupied while I hang out here with you.”

Shit.

Yeah, he’d much rather have Daria than his mom and aunts.

“I’ll have to thank Rashida for her sacrifice.” Though, truthfully, it wasn’t a huge one. The moms all loved her and the fact she was currently seven months pregnant didn’t hurt.

“I’ve promised to update her later tonight about why you’re such a sad sack.”

Q snorted, lifting his beer to take a drink. He didn’t usually drink at the family gatherings, but today, he’d wanted one. Just to take the edge off. And instead of being in the middle of the kids, he’d gone out to the front porch to wallow.

He’d been hoping not to be missed among all the chaos. He’d waited until after the presents were open to sneak off and thought no one had noticed. He should have known better.

Daria let him sit in silence for a whole thirty seconds before she finally nudged him with her elbow. Except instead of a nudge, it was more like a jab to the ribs, and it hurt.

“Ow. Okay, fine.” Q sighed again. “It’s like this.”

He’d already told her about Sam at Thanksgiving. Daria had remembered the girl who changed her mind about going to prom with him. She’d been intrigued that he and Sam had found each other again—at a kink club no less. The update on what had happened since then was a lot less fun.

The noise going on in the house behind them reassured him the rest of his family probably wouldn’t hear him talking, but he kept his voice low just in case. The last thing he needed was everyone trooping out to give him relationship advice. Or, worse, asking what kink was.

“So, I told her we’d talk when I got back,” he finished up wearily. Laying it all out, he still wasn’t sure how he felt about everything that had gone down. He’d been right to be upset, but at the same time, he felt like shit about how he’d walked out on her. On the other hand, he wasn’t sure that staying would have helped. He didn’t know what he might have said if he had. He’d been pissed and lashing out.

“Do you think you might have been leaving her before she left you this time?” Daria asked.

Trust his cousin to get straight to the heart of things. Q winced. He felt the question like a physical blow, which meant there was more than a little truth to it.

“Maybe,” he temporized, rather than admitting it. “But the fact she didn’t even tell me she interviewed for a job in Ohio shows that we’re not on the same page.”

“She did say she wasn’t planning on taking it.”

Q threw up his hands, careful not to slosh his beer.

“Then why even interview?”

“That’s something only she can answer.” Daria was silent for a moment. “Money changes things, though. I could see Rashida doing something similar when we first got together. Not because she’d want to leave me, but because of the money.”