Page 452 of Call Me Baby 2: Side B

// 11:58 AM //

“Funny story.”

I strum the guitar once, then twice.

“In less than seventy-two hours,

“I find out that I’m a monster,

“just like the bastard you left me with.”

Three times.

“And that I’m addicted to a boy.

“Who can’t be with me anymore.”

I slap my palm against the strings.

“Don’t worry, Dad… he’s still alive.”

// 12:29 PM //

I write:

I gave up Teddy, you put up walls,

I gave you sky, you watched me fall

I held my breath so you could breathe

then hated you for not needing me…

I stare at it.

Cross out then hated.

Write now I’m mad at.

Cross out now I’m mad at.

Write then hated.

Then tear out the paper and rip it to shreds.

// 1:02 PM //

“Do you think he opened his present?”

I’m lying on my side, facing the mausoleum. Then turn to lie on my back, spotting a silver canvas sky through naked branches.

“Still, I wish I could’ve seen his face.”

I close my eyes, imagining him sitting on the couch after I left⁠—

all alone,

in the dark,