“What I seem in public isn’t how I am in private.” Roger hooked his finger under Kit’s chin and made them look up. “And I’m not exactly how I used to be. Vampires can change.”
“Oh.”
“I’m disappointing you.”
“Yeah. Kind of. But this is kind of new for me. People were a little more private about some of the displays in Taliville. You had to get invited to watch a flogging; you didn’t just walk past it almost every night.”
“That’s true.” Roger glanced to Kit’s neck. They were already wearing their collar. They’d made more of a habit of it than necessary.How am I only just realizing this?“You want to feel the ownership a collar should provide.”
Kit’s hand went to their throat, touching the crest tag and then drifting to the side. “I think I do. I used to have these fantasies that I thought were wacky but only scratched the surface of what I’ve seen. But it’s also obvious. You really only have eyes for Zack and Takashi. I don’t blip your radar.”
“Should I be apologizing?” Roger asked.
“Nope. You made it clear from the get-go. This was transactional. I’ll be fine.” Kit held out their wrist.
Roger took hold of their offered wrist. There wasn’t much more he could say, so he used a thread of his power to soothe Kit’s nerves and then bit them. Their blood held a trace of their werefox magic and eased the itch building in Roger’s skin. He only drank enough to ease his hunger rather than sate it.
“Thank you,” Roger said.
Kit held their wrist upward, and the wound began to close. It would be another minute or so before the minor injury was completely closed and a little longer than that before it disappeared entirely.
“You do matter to me, Kit,” Roger said.
“Yeah, but only kind of.”
“Kit.”
Rather than look at him, they shook their head and kept their gaze on their wound. “The money’s good, you’ve always been up-front with what you want, and I got out of Taliville. What more could I really want?”
“It isn’t awful to want more,” Roger replied. He ducked down so that he was in their eyeline. “You should have someone to guard your heart, if that’s what you want. But you’re right. That’s not me.”
“Ugh. You’re going to make me cry, and that’s going to wreck my makeup.”
“I should be getting dressed myself,” Roger said. “I’ll see you in a few minutes?”
“Of course,” Kit said.
Roger left their bedroom and slowly walked down the stairs. The open staircase lent him too much vision of the suite, and his gaze was drawn toward the darkness past the glass doors leading to the balcony. With the lights on in the suite, seeing anythingof their small portion of the Chicago skyline or Lake Michigan beyond was impossible. But the world was out there. Waiting.
Maybe journaling is miserable for me. I’m falling too easily into this brooding mood. Only the conversation that he’d had with Kit sounded very close to the dozens he’d had in the past. Pets left, for one reason or another. Some few he’d actually dismissed, but most seemed to grow tired of him or tired of how he behaved toward them and left.
Roger let his hand drift along the length of the railing until he finally reached the first floor. They had practiced a little at dusk and hadn’t bothered to move the couches back. Carver had pushed one of the couches a few inches out of his way and was behind the bar.
“What are you looking for?” Roger asked.
“Can you believe everything is top-shelf? I’m looking for some lower-brand stuff so I can feel the burn, but it’s all expensive shit. Ah! This’ll work.” Carver straightened with a bottle of rum in his hands. He was dressed for the night. His deep blue tuxedo had a double-breasted jacket. The velvet had the lightest shimmer to the fabric, and he had a nearly translucent silver shirt on with it. Instead of the usual collar, he had a bow tie made from a custom fabric with Roger’s crest. Either Kit or Zack had convinced him to try a little makeup again, and the hint of eyeliner brought attention to the sparkle in his eyes.
“You look amazing,” Roger said.
“Yeah, but who wears it better?” Zack asked.
Zack was leaning against the doorframe leading to the master bedroom. He had an identical tuxedo and bow tie to Carver’s, though fitted to his slimmer form. In addition to the silver cufflinks—of which Roger had made certain they were pure silver and outfitted Carver with matching ones—Zack wore the white-gold dagger necklace that Takashi had given him for hisbirthday. With his hair styled and light makeup on, he had the full swagger of a man ready for an evening of refined entertainment.
Roger had gotten hard more than a few times while looking at Zack, but he wasn’t sure he’d ever had such a quick reaction to seeing his lover dressed.
“Ha, ready before you for a change,” Zack teased.
“You are,” Roger said breathlessly.
