I think we just might be growing on one another.
I hid the portrait in the floorboards, tucking it beneath Tershetta’s curl I’d stolen.
If only my Little Void could see us now.
***
Maitoza told me today that Tershetta has been hunting me down. I wonder if she knows the real murderer is far closer to her.
At least, I assume so. No one other than my father had good reason to do it. Or Talon, maybe.
It’d be far wiser to run, but I didn’t see her doing that. Stubborn as always.
***
I dreamt of Tershetta again last night.
Chapter Two
Azazel
“Father broke one of my ribs yesterday. All I asked was why we were better than the eadi. I wasn’t trying to be defiant. I swear.”
-From the journal of Azazel Altair, 9217 AS
Celeste was most definitely panicking. I could see it in the way she nearly vibrated as she looked at her sister. Eyes widening, she shook her head and stared in silence, not speaking in the moments since whispering her odd nickname for Tershetta.
Not that I had a leg to stand on when it came to nicknames.
Was that what Little Void was? A nickname? Stars above, when had it stopped being an insult?
“Where’s Desi?” I asked, my grip on the unconscious girl in my hands still strong. Celeste must have noticed, because she blinked ferociously and launched forward.
“Give me her!” Hysteria seeped from her voice, painting the air with panic in only the way she could. In the many months I had spent training at her side, I had never seen Celeste get so…worked up. No, distraught was a better word. Still, knowing that she was unwell didn’t stop me from tugging Tershetta farther into me, my eyes just catching Maitoza’s wicked smile before it faded.
“I’ve got her. Where is Desi? We need her. I can’t do this on my own.” Staying calm stole nearly all of my focus. The only sliver of it left was dedicated to the way Tershetta’s lips and nose pressed into my chest. How she seemed to breathe slower and slower every second. Just as before, I was suddenly hit with the horrific realization that I no longer eagerly awaited her final gasps of air. Why, I didn’t know, because Tershetta was nothing to me but an obstacle.
“She was right behind me,” Celeste huffed, her hands reaching for Tershetta a second time. Again, I found myself clinging to my Little Void, watching in shame and confusion as Celeste sat back and eyed me beneath furrowed brows. Her head tilted to the side, jaw flexing. Beside her, Maitoza watched with wide eyes and a startling grin. I was misstepping somehow. I could see it in the eagerness that lifted the commander’s face. Celeste’s hand drew my attention once more as it latched onto my wrist. “Give me my sister, Azazel.”
Before I could come up with some excuse, Desi finally shot through the doorway. “I’m here, I’m here! I’m so sorry. I forgot my medbag and had to have Jonah take me back!” Her pin straight hair cascaded behind her in a wave of black, her red-tinted, deep skin damp from exertion, beads of sweat dripping down her tattooed cheeks.
A hefty breath tore down my throat, barreling back out of my mouth in relief. Relief? Yes. That’s exactly what it was. Tingles scattered across my body as I adjusted Tershetta in my arms, Celeste’s hand still firmly around my wrist but her eyes on Desi.
“Az, you can set her down now.” Desi’s voice was a commanding boom, though gentle in its own way.
Desi was never soft spoken. Always loud and boisterous, eager to earn laughs or smiles. Six months of time had passed and she still fought tooth and nail to get a chuckle out of me. She reminded me of Cal in that way.
I sent her a glare. Of course she’d unknowingly side with Celeste.
“How about you carry her to the bed, Azazel?” Maitoza cut in, her voice cool but soft, twisted up with faux care. I knew exactly what she was, even if no one else did. But in that moment, she was giving me a win, and I wasn’t too proud to take it.
“Okay.” Bracing myself, I gripped Tershetta tighter and pushed up on my feet, standing slowly. Celeste’s hand fell as I began walking, but I felt her stare burning into my back.
Get a fucking grip, Az.
Gently, I set Tershetta down, the pool of her silk dress and tangle of her matted hair reminding me of what I knew to be true. She was not made for this life.
I felt my fingers slipping from the bare skin of her shoulder, the prickle of my returned blood flow making way for another kind of tingle. One that couldn’t be so easily explained, because I simply couldn’t understand it.
