Everything inside me deflated. I nodded, bitterness lodged in my chest as I continued applying mascara.
“That’s all I need to hear,” I said coldly.
“I’m sorry, Nova. It surprised me too, especially after his initial message. I don’t know.”
“And we’ll never know,” I said, steadying myself with a glare into my own dark eyes in the mirror. “I thought I understood him finally, but maybe I never did. You can’t understand someone who keeps you in the dark, who guards himself with secrets and gives up the moment he’s revealed.” Tears pricked my eyes, and I ground my teeth, forcing them to dry up before they ruined the makeup I’d just put on. “He gave me up like I never meant anything to him. All that talk about protecting me from The Circle clearly only applied when he saw me ashis. And now that I’m not, he couldn’t care less.”
Hudson’s face fell. He looked at the counter for a moment before rubbing my shoulder. “I believed him too, Nova. I really did. I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” I lied. “I’m over it,” I lied again.
I couldn’t justify taking a car right now, so I wore sneakers with my lacey white satin slip dress covered by my big winter jacket. I’d brought heels in my bag, as I knew The Circle turned away anyone who didn’t respect theirelevateddress expectations.
They would hate to know I spent a whopping twenty-five dollars on my slip. It was revealing enough to pass in a sex party without showing more than I was willing to show tonight.
I’d pressed Lorelei for an exact location to meet her, knowing we wouldn’t have our phones, and I wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible. But she’d stopped responding.
As I approached the church, I couldn’t help but feel like a sacrificial lamb in white on the way to her own slaughter.
A black SUV pulled up to the curb, and three women in wintry blue gowns and furs stepped out of the car with an old man in a suit. The women each wore flashy diamond necklaces, walking arm in arm toward the church. When I climbed the steps after them, they glanced at me in my beat-up sneakers and long puff jacket like we couldn’t possibly be going to the same place.
Inside the entry hall, a man with sideburns in a tux immediately stepped forward. “Please wait in line here for phone and coat check. And be ready to deliver your unique, individual passwords.”
They wanted to beEyes Wide Shutso badly.
I fought the urge to roll my eyes at The Circle’s theatrics. I stepped into the line facing the check-in desk, where my least favorite cult underling now stared at me with a sharp gaze. Her auburn hair was in a perfect, cunty bob, and I could already tell she was taking her job way too seriously.
Oh, how I’d missed her.
The women in diamonds stood behind me, and two women in front of me were leaned in close, clearly gossiping.
“Guess who’s here,” the woman with big brown eyes and warm, tan skin whispered to her mousy brunette confidante. She leaned in close and whispered.
I was not ashamed to admit I leaned forward a little, just barely catching the name of a hot male actor.
“Oh my God, stop.”
She nodded, beaming with satisfaction. “Mmhmm. It’s not fair that most of the moneybags in New York are ugly. We need to get to the LA location’s grand opening. Their moneybags have a much higher chance of being wealthyandhot.”
Oh, God. Not an LA version of The Circle. I shuddered to imagine the traction a pseudo-spiritual kinky cult could gain in Hollywood. Forget complimentary reiki on the way out. I bet they’d offer complimentary buccal fat removal.
This place did not need to be spreading across the country like a damn virus.
“And guess whatelse,” the first woman continued, still whispering. “Jaynehatesher LA female counterpart.”
“Ohmygod why?”
“Because she’s a huge social media influencer and self-proclaimedspiritual guru. Like, huge. I mean, you probably already follow her. Butalso,there’s this?—”
“Do you mind?” the mousy brunette suddenly asked, whipping her head to look at me pointedly.
I took a step back and raised my hands in the air. “My bad.”
The other girl assessed me. “You’re going to run and tell Jayne and Jayne’s bathwater drinker, aren’t you?”
I lifted my brows. “No. I was riveted for my own pleasure only.” I paused. “Do you mean Maisy?” I couldn’t help but smirk a little at the description.
The smirk seemed to work in my favor, as the brunette giggled and her friend relaxed an inch. “Last holiday party, I watched that girl literallybegto suck Archer’s dick just to taste Jayne on him. She thought it would transmute ancient wisdom to her or some shit.”
