One morning, maybe a week later, maybe a month? I woke with a bleak resignation that something had to end. I drove to the hospital, same as I had every other day, accepted a coffee from the nurse in charge that I wouldn’t drink, and sat at my father’s bedside for the last time. His hand was cold as I cradled it between mine.
“I love you so much, Dad, but I know you need her.”
“Sir? You can’t be in here.”
I ignored the voices outside the room. I’d learned that hospitals were busy places at any time of day.
“It’s okay. I’ll be okay. You can let go now. She’s waiting for you.”
At first, nothing changed, then the heart rate monitor stuttered and slowed. The room darkened with a passing shadow as alarms started to sound.
“Dad?”
The monitor flatlined, and the speaker crackled, announcing a Code Blue in room five.
“Daddy?” I lunged for his body, but strong arms wrapped around me from behind. I caught a glimpse of dark hair and steel-blue eyes as I flailed in panic.
“I changed my mind!” I screamed, desperate to take it back. “I changed my mind. I need him.”
I collapsed in Calix’s strong hold as a sob ripped from my chest and medical personnel flooded the room.
“Take her outside, please,” someone instructed, and I was pulled away from the pointless activity. They were trying to save a corpse.
Calix swept me into his arms and strode down the corridor, taking a seat on the uncomfortably hard chairs as he cradled me in his lap. I clung to him, crying until my voice was hoarse and my head ached.
When I finally settled, there was silence.
It was eerie after all the noise I’d grown accustomed to, and I wondered if this was what death truly was. The absence of noise.
Beneath my cheek, I could feel the steady beat of a working heart. A strong palm smoothed circles over my back. Grounding me.
Chapter
Thirty-One
Calix
“What are you doing here?”she asked eventually, having to try twice before her voice would work.
“You left. That wasn’t acceptable.”
She huffed a laugh. “You know you don’t control the world, right?”
I paused, considering the accusation before dismissing it out of turn with a sigh. “I control enough of it. Why didn’t you tell us what happened?”
When Otis and Harvey returned to the bus and told us about Tatum’s hurried departure, I admittedly didn’t take it well at first. I’d blamed Harvey for forcing her into an uncomfortable situation and took a swing that Tobias had thankfully stopped. The only information we’d had was that a phone call had come in from Wisconsin, and she’d left with no instructions other than to perform the shows we had booked.
Fuck that.
It had taken Otis telling us the entire story of how she came to be our manager for me to agree to wait.
Seven fucking days, and I arrived just in time to see her lose her father.
Tatum buried her nose in my chest, inhaling deeply. She thought I hadn’t noticed how much she liked this fragrance.
Of course I noticed.
Just like I saw how her shoulders dropped, relaxing just a touch because she felt safe. With me. I’d never been anyone’s protector—Tobias excepted—but it made a deep, primal part of me sit up and crow.
