The hand that Cruz has wrapped around my shoulder tangles in the hair at the nape of my neck. “What was I doing in the dream when I called you that?” He leans in closer, ducking his head to run his nose along the column of my neck before burying it in my hair and whispering, “Tell me, Hermosa.”
I shiver—fuckingshiver—at the command in his voice. But I shake my head, needing to hold on to that piece of me for now.
“No?” He pulls back, and his expression is steely.
“Nope,” I tell him, shaking my head wildly. Loving the new side of him he’s giving me a glimpse of. I’ve seen it before, but never like this, where it’s aimed entirely at me, with this much intensity behind it. Usually, it takes on a more playful quality with us, like after movie night when he pinned me to the bed. That was hot as hell, but this is on a whole other level. My thighs clench together trying to stem the desire settling low in my belly.
Cruz pointedly looks down at his lap where my legs are and groans before looking at me again. “That isn’t playing fair. This is your warning, I’ve got one more thing to say, and then I’m going to pull you into my lap, and kiss you until you can’t remember anyone that came before me.”
I blink at him. Once, twice, and then nod, waiting for him to continue. Although I’m not sure I’ll be able to hear anything over the rushing of the blood in my ears.
“Here is how I see this going.” He laces his fingers through mine. It’s sweet compared to all the heat he’s been throwing off. “We’re going to date. Publicly. I want everyone to know you are mine, and I’m yours. I’m going to take you to dinner, movies, concerts, anything you want. When I’m on the road, we’ll video chat. Now that you hired Willa—once you get her trained and you’re comfortable—I would love for you to join me on an away series.”
“That sounds a lot like what we do now,” I muse out loud.
Cruz’s hand tilts up my chin. “I wasn’t done, Hermosa. There’s going to be kissing. So much fucking kissing. I’ve waited too long to get a taste of you.”
“Is that all?” I ask, raising my eyebrow.
He shakes his head. “You want more?”
I bite my lip. Cruz brings his thumb to my lip, his eyes dropping to it as he pulls down, freeing it from my teeth.
“It drives me crazy when you bite that lip.” His forehead rests against mine. “When you’re ready, there will be more. I want every piece of you. Are you going to give it to me?”
As I nod, he graps me by the hips and shifts me into his lap, so I’m straddling him. An unexpected laugh bubbles out of me. Even with the warning, I’m still taken by surprise.
“A nod isn’t gonna cut it on this one. I need to hear the words. Tell me you want me too. That you want to be mine, and that I get all of you.”
“I want you too.” I rest my forehead against his. “I want you to be mine as much as I want to be yours. I’m still scared, but I think we could be great together. I need you to swear I won’t lose you.” But even as I make him say it, I know it’s not a promise he can keep.
“Never. I swear you will never lose me. As long as I’m here on this earth, I will be yours in whatever form. Lover, friend, whatever you need from me.”
“That’s all I needed to know. Make me yours, Cruz.”
His lips are on mine as soon as the words are out of my mouth. I gasp in surprise before I melt into him. His strong arms band around my waist, pulling me to him as his soft lips move against mine. They blaze a path from my mouth down to my neck, layering kisses across the sensitive skin there before returning to where he started.
This time I’m ready for him, and I kiss him back. His lips part for me, and my tongue sweeps against his. His answering groan only makes me greedier. The fear is still there, but it’s buried so deep under the yearning that I almost forget about it.
My heart punches my ribs as his curls slip through my fingers. Nothing about kissing my best friend feels the way I thought it would. It’s the best kiss of my life. And I have a startling thought that I hope it’s mylastfirst kiss. It’s the one thing about giving into my feelings that doesn’t scare me at all.
My hips rock searching for any friction they can find because he was right, that kiss did its job and I can’t remember anything but him. I immediately find what I’m looking for when my pelvis tilts forward, rubbing against where he’s hard. His hands ghost up my back, wrap around the base of my skull holding me tight. An instant later he breaks the kiss, our chests heave brushing together.
“Not today, Hermosa.”
“You don’t want—” My words die on my tongue. He lifts his hips, brushing the apex of my thighs.
“There’s nothing I want more. But what we want, and what weneedaren’t always the same thing. That kiss changed everything, and we both have fears and insecurities about what this means for us. I want to take it slow and make sure that we work through those things first.”
“You’re bossy, and I’m not sure I like it.” That’s a lie. It’s inconvenient that he’s using logic to put a stop to the fun my body was begging for but I can’t deny I like that he takes charge here.
“You fucking love it, and you’re going to love it even more when I’m bossing you around in bed.” His lips flutter softly against the sensitive skin making my brain short-circuit, and a moan slips past my lips.
“It’s time for me to go,” Cruz announces, unprompted. Kissing me on the forehead before standing and lowering me to the ground.
“You’re serious?”
“As a heart attack.” His arm wraps around my waist, holding me to him as I look up at him. “I meant what I said about taking this slow. It’s too important to fuck it up by rushing into this. If I take you to your bedroom right now and fuck you the way I want to, you’re going to spiral as soon as it’s over. You’ll go into a tailspin of panic and overanalyze everything. I won’t risk us like that.”
