She self-corrects. “Provide a sample.” Then she trains her glare at me. “Are you ready?”
“No,” I say. Not knowing at least gave me a sliver of hope. But as soon as she starts poking around in there, we’re going to know the truth. If the nanobots didn’t work, then my future is child-free, which has its pluses and minuses. If they did work, then I’m with a partner who doesn’t want kids to begin with. There’s no winning with this knowledge.
“Come on.” Waverly opens and closes her hands. “We’ll go with you and stay near your head, so we don’t get a free show.” I huff a laugh. I guess knowledge means I can start planning better, so there's that. But I look at Grae, and his eyes are dilated. There's a quiver in his hands as he grips my hips tighter. Oh I know these signs, but no one else in the room seems phased.
“Fine, I’ll go.” I say, and Waverly lifts me from the bed.
Grae gives me a forced smile. “Babe, I’m really proud of you that you’re not doing this alone. Do you want me to come with you?” I pat his chest and feel his heart pounding.
“No, that’s ok. We both know you are in the middle of a panic attack.” As I stand, I call out to Dr Cooper, “He’s gonna need a heavy sedative.”
She gives me a side-eye but hooks one of his EKG nodes back up to the machine and his heart sounds faster than an EDM rave. Her eyes widen. “How are you not dead?”
“Lifetime of practice,” he says with a sigh, no hint of pride.
Twenty minutes later, I’m back in his room. He’s staring at his hands, wiggling his fingers and giggling slightly. “Hiiiii.” He drags out the one syllable word into three. I guess the meds kicked in.
“Hi.”
He pats the side of his bed with a dramatic thump. “How did it go?”
“Do you want the technical answer?”
“I want little words… my brain is furry right now.”
“Furry?” I repeat, and he dips his head like it weighs six hundred pounds. I’m nervous as I whisper, “I’m going on birth control and I need monthly checkups to see the status of my reproductive organs. The stupid little nanobots are doing their thing a little too well.”
I wait for his response. Each second feels like a lifetime. “Those weren’t little words.” A slow smile crosses his lips. “My worst nightmare was to get you pregnant when we were teenagers. It’s different now.”
“And the vasectomy?"
“I didn’t want someone to use me for my money. I was a cynical bastard because my heart was broken, that’s not the case anymore.” He touches his index finger to his thumb. “Lance came in and told me I’m very pretty.” He moves on to tapping his middle finger to his thumb. “I think he’s trying to be nice.” Next comes his ring finger. “I think he knows I love you.”
My frown is fighting hard to suppress a smile. “I think that would mean more if you weren’t stoned.”
“I won't be offended if you don't say it right now." He flashes me a shit-eating grin because he knows he’s right. “I’ll tell you every day for the rest of our lives once I’m back to normal...ish.”
I lie down next to him and rest my head on his chest. His arm flops down on my side like he has no control of his body. I have no control either, and for once, I don’t completely hate it. “I look forward to hearing that.”
CHAPTER 41
Grae
Later
Two weeks away from her, and I’m pretty sure I’m going to die. Once we were both medically cleared for travel, I finally convinced Alana to go to Japan with me. Kyoto was awesome—otters, temples, cats, and Pokémon. We went to Nara, where we were both aggressively attacked by deer, and spent a day in Osaka. She declared it a draw, but there were other places we needed to travel to in order to see who had the best overall taste.
Then I flew to Seoul, and it was dull and boring without her. I got a ton of work done and met a few of my dream clients, and the whole venture will be sure to bring me more time on the charts. But I was counting the minutes until I could get back on the plane. Even first class isn’t enough to make the trip home less tortuous. I’ve got travel stank in every crease in my skin. My only mission is to go home, kiss Alana, shower and fuck her stupid. Maybe if we multi-task we can get some pregame action in the shower.
Finally, I drag my bags up her stairs and unlock her front door. She’s been staying at the house because it’s so close to Amanda. Plus, Midge likes it more.
“I’m home.” I drop my bags in the foyer.
Alana stands in her living room, wearing black leggings and a baggie sweatshirt. Excellent. No buttons to fight with, all for easy removal. I’m about to kiss her when I stop dead in my tracks. She’s twisting her fingers around and biting her lower lip.
“Don’t be mad,” she rushes out. Oh no. My brain flips through the millions of things that could be wrong, but I stop at number 176 because that’s when she speaks again. “I got you something, and I think I really messed up.”
Now I’m even more confused. “Whatever it is, we’ll work it out together.”
