I would always protect him.
He was my life, my everything.
Now that I had my powers back, I could keep him safe. And I would. Be it from Hell or Heaven, I would face it all and destroy it if it meant keeping him safe.
Diablos was mine to protect, mine to love.
Now that he knew I was a demon, I would make it clear that the extent to which I would go for him had no limit.
Chapter twenty-seven
Diablos
The previous night played in my mind on repeat. The sobs that shook Dagon’s body after he told me about his brother shattered my soul. My heart broke for him and his brother, whom I’d never get to meet. It hurt to think about this child whose life was taken in such a brutal way. It hurt to think about Dagon witnessing his brother die in front of him.
I couldn’t imagine how much it hurt. He had witnessed his brother being killed. He had to move on all alone in a place he knew nothing about. I was so grateful that King brought him into the family, registered him (since he didn’t have papers), and adopted him.
Dagon didn't say it out loud, but I knew the promise he made to his dying brother was to not unleash his powers. That promisewas the last thing his brother heard before taking his last breath. My heart literally ached.
Dagon kept that promise for fifteen years across worlds. He locked parts of himsel. And somehow despite the soul-crushing death of his brother and the loss of his powers… he continued to live. He continued to care and love. Now I understood why he was so protective of all all of us. We were his brothers. Of course, none of us can ever replace his biological brother, but he still saw us as his.
I started thinking back. Every memory of Dagon shifting under a different light now.
The guy who beat me up in high school. After I told about it to Dagon, the guy didn't come back to school for weeks. When he did, he wouldn't look at me. Wouldn't look at any of us. I'd thought it was satisfying at the time. Now I understood it was Dagon making sure no one would ever hurt one of his brothers again. Eventually the guy transferred schools.
Luc. The summer Luc got cornered behind the cinema by older kids who wanted money. None of us knew until weeks later, and even then we only found out because Wilder let it slip. By the time we knew, the older kids had been "spoken to." Luc never had a problem with them again because they moved schools too. Dagon never said a word about it. Of course he didn't. He never said a word about any of it. But now I realize it was him making it possible for Luc to not be bullied.
Andras getting his car keyed by a police officer who was his patient. The car got keyed once. After that, never again. The police officer lost his job because they found out he was taking bribes and protecting perpetrators, not victims. He moved to a different town within the year. I'd noticed. We'd all noticed. None of us had asked because Andras doesn't like to speak about it. Again, now I have a strong suspicion it was all Dagon's doing.
Bren. He was always the biggest troublemaker in the family with a golden heart. I always wondered how he didn't get beaten up because of the pranks he and his best friend (and sometimes I too) would pull. It must have been Dagon stalking us and Bren to make sure we were okay.
Wilder was the visible protector, the older brother who would get in your face about your problems and help. And then there was Dagon – the invisible one. The one who handled things quietly. Cleanly. Without making any of us feel small for needing protection.
He'd been protecting us. All of us. From the shadows. For years.
Because he lost one brother and could never lose another.
With a twist in my gut, I realized yet again that all this time, Dagon had been terrified he would lose one of his brothers again.
He lived with that fear every single day.
Just like I lived with mine because of my fucked-up brain.
Fuck.
I rubbed my chest like that would ease the pain.
I also couldn’t imagine what it was like for Dagon to never speak about his brother. He carried his memory deep inside, sealing the nightmare of losing him. He was all alone in the pain and the horrors.
Dagon never felt safe enough to feel. I realized that when he admitted his tears were frozen. His pain was so big.
He was never safe. Not as a demon in the underworld. Not as an orphan in King's house. Not even in front of the Hughes brothers because he believed he needed to be the strong one. He never felt safe to feel as a brother carrying a promise. Not as a man who loved me and couldn't have me.
Just how much pain had he lived in all this time without anyone holding him?
Never again.
Dagon would never again be alone.
