I opened the door and saw Sophia sitting in the living room on the couch with her feet up on the coffee table, glaring at Leo as he walked to the kitchen with Adrian. Leo was talking a mile a minute about what food was good for the baby. Adrian and Sutton’s Shepard mix, Thor, came trotting over for pets, and I bent down to scratch him.
“See? Extra,” Mom said, gesturing at Leo as he told Adrian about a years-old listeria outbreak in hummus.
We said hello to everyone, and I walked over to Sophia and bent down to hug her. “Jace,” she whispered. “If you don’t get him to put something with chocolate on my plate, I will murder him. Right here in front of you all.”
I laughed and released her before sitting down beside her. “I take it the hockey star is taking your wellbeing a bit too seriously?”
“He’s read three pregnancy books. I haven’t even finished one. I have no idea when he is finding the time for it, but someone needs to help me manage him because I’m too tired and I want a fucking brownie.”
“I’ve got you, Soph,” I said, patting her shoulder. I yelled into the kitchen, “Hey, Leo. Give your wife some chocolate.”
“Sugar isn’t good for the baby,” he yelled back. “There’s caffeine in chocolate and she already insists on drinking a latte every day.”
My moms were standing with Sutton in the dining room. They all looked between each other like they knew one of them had to give him some advice on how far to push his wife but none of them were volunteering to step up to the plate.
“You know what’s bad for the baby? A pissed-off, pregnant wife, little dude. Give the woman a brownie,” I said.
Leo sighed. “Fine,” he grumbled as he filled her plate. “I’m just trying to keep the two people I love most in the world healthy, but I suppose if they want sugar, I’ll pile the plate full of sugar, consequences be damned.”
“And a latte!” Sophia yelled.
He froze and gave her ano way in helllook. “Now you’re pushing it, Hawaii,” he said through clenched teeth.
“I will make you adecafvanilla latte, Sophia,” Adrian said, starting the fancy espresso machine before Leo could protest.
Leo grumbled about everyone always being on her side. “I knew you liked her better.”
He walked back into the room with a brownie sitting atop a plate full of vegetables and dip—hummus noticeably missing. Sophia’s face litup when she saw the brownie and I stood up to give them some space. “Congratulations, Sophia. You’re going to be an amazing mom,” I said.
Leo took my spot on the couch and handed her the plate, smiling at her adoringly as he rubbed her non-existent belly and kissed her on the cheek. Her bright blue eyes sparkled at him, clearly enamored by his obsessive love for her and they leaned their dark-haired heads together.
In truth, they were the cutest couple I’d ever seen and watching them together made me think about Liv when she was pregnant. I wondered about all the moments like this that she’d spent alone. She’d shared some big moments with her mother, others with me—she’d let me feel Kaylee kicking her occasionally—but none of that was the same as how Sophia and Leo were experiencing it all together. Meanwhile, Kayden had missed it all, every opportunity to love them the way Leo loved Sophia and their baby.
If Liv had told him she was pregnant, would they be together right now? Would I even be in their lives at all? Would she and I be friends? Would he and I have started whatever we’re doing now?The thought that I might have met them, only to be an outsider to their love twisted like a knife in the gut.If she tells him now, is that my future anyway?
By the time weleft Adrian and Sutton’s, I was tired of pretending I wasn’t preoccupied with stress. I sat down on my moms’ couch with a beer and sighed. I’d only been carrying this secret for a little over a day and it was slowly killing me. I’d gone to Liv’s as planned last night, but I’d busied myself by offering to put Kaylee to bed and making Liv dinner, trying to minimize the talking as much as possible. All I wanted to do was beg her to tell Kayden the truth but I knew it was too soon to bringit up again. She deserved time to process the situation for what it was, and my stress wouldn’t help her do that.
I’d known I was quickly developing feelings for Kayden, something that had never happened with a fling before, but I hadn’t realized how intense those feelings were until I imagined how hurt he was going to feel when he found out the truth and my heart ached on his behalf already. He’d been hurt by the people who were supposed to love him enough. I didn’t want to be remotely responsible for hurting him.
I wanted to be the one to hold him and tell him it would be okay, just like I’d done with Liv.
Mom sat down next to me with a hard seltzer and pulled Ima down onto her lap. “Talk to us, kid.”
“I’m going to tell you what’s going on because I desperately need to talk about this. But I’ll be telling you the secrets of two people who I really care about. You can’t repeat anything I say. Ever. Especially not to Adrian and Sutton,” I said, thinking of Kayden and his involvement with Acker Real Estate.
“Of course, we won’t say anything, honey,” Ima said, gently taking my hand.
“Even I can keep a secret when it’s important, Jace,” Mom said. “Just tell us.”
I pulled my hand back and dropped my head in both hands as I groaned. “I hate this so much.” I rubbed my face with both hands and looked up at them. “I started something casual with a guy I met in a bar a few weeks ago. He turned out to be the architect who I’d hired for the rehab facility at work, but neither of us knew that at the time.”
“Okay,” Ima said, gently encouraging me to continue.
“I like him—a lot.” I laughed and shook my head, still surprised at the truth of it. I thought Liv was the only person I’d ever want, and nowI wanted them both and what the hell was I supposed to do with that? “His name is Kayden, and we’ve hooked up a few times. I want to keep seeing him and I’m pretty sure he wants that too. He’s guarded as hell, but I can tell he feels something for me.”
“I’m missing the problem,” Mom said. “Unless you’re afraid of love like she was”—she pointed to Ima—“becausethatI can actually help with.”
Ima shot her a look. “I’m guessing this has to do with Liv.”
