“You never met him,” the Emperor said.
“He took you from me. I wish I’d killed him myself.” My response was immediate. I could tell the smile had fallen from my face, and my words were tinged with iron.
However, my less-than-charming outburst did not offend the Emperor. Her mask of ice melted a little. Her eyes drooped sadly, and the hint of a wistful grin played across her mouth. “It wasn’t my first choice either,” she admitted. “But, duty calls.”
“Indeed it does,” I said.
“He thought he could control me from behind the throne,” she said, as though that explained everything. In a way, it did. Imperial inheritance did not work the same as in the Commonwealth, and her father would have been first in line to take the throne should Astrid have fallen.
“Can’t have that,” I said. “Those viziers always wind up wondering why they need to rule through you when they could rule alone.”
“I’m glad you understand. I was worried you Allies would find it…” She paused, searching for the right word. “Distasteful,” she said in the Emperor’s voice.
“I never said I didn’t find it distasteful.” I gave her a moment to look inquisitively at me. “I would have much preferred if you’d killed him before he called you back to the Empire.”
Astrid smiled again, slightly warmer this time. “Yes, but then I’d never have been Emperor.”
Her comment sent several simultaneous thoughts through my head.
Would that have been so bad?
But we would have been together.
Damn the Empire.
And there would have been no war.
But I could say none of those things, not to my Astrid, and definitely not to the Emperor. As I said nothing, Astrid had nothing to reply to, and we lapsed back into silence.
“It’s good to see you,” she said after a few stanzas, sounding more like Astrid than the Emperor.
“And to see you,” I replied.
“I did not expect to see you here,” she commented. “Most attendees outrank you by a considerable margin.”
“True, but I would never have expected to see you hereeither. Last we met, you were still a baron’s daughter.” I tripped over the memory of her leaving, the pain both emotional and physical that her exit from my life had caused, and had to blink back a sudden pressure of tears.
“It is not unprecedented for barons to rise as I have, even to Imperial rank. But you are still just a captain. I think the next lowest rank I see here is a colonel, as a field marshal’s assistant,” Astrid commented, but she did not look around to confirm. Her eyes were still locked on mine.
“Well, to be honest, I am an assistant as well. I’m only here because of you,” I replied.
Astrid was controlled enough not to start, but her pupils expanded in shock, as though she’d never considered that reaching out via diplomatic channels might bring me back to her. Trying to soften her mood, I leaned in and murmured, “I never thought I’d see you again, not after…”
“… after my father took me away from the Academy,” Astrid finished. I nodded, but could think of nothing to say. It seemed neither could Astrid, as there was another awkward pause while she collected her thoughts.
“It was not my wish to go,” she finally said. “My father arranged my marriage despite my absence.”
“So you said then, but you went anyway,” I replied.
“It was my duty. I had no choice,” she insisted.
“So you said then,” I repeated, a bit of venom in my voice.
Another bout of silence reigned, but Astrid broke it.
“I’m pleased to see you’ve survived.”
“So am I. Did you worry about me?” I asked.
