“That hot and heavy?” His brows waggle.
“We almost kissed, okay?” I grit my teeth and cross my arms overmy chest. “At least, it seemed like an almost on my end. I have no idea what it was to her.”
“An almost kiss? Maybe you’re not so hopeless after all,” he says. “Kayla and I didn’t have that much to go off of before I asked her out.”
“I could be wrong.”But I don’t think I am.I saw the way she looked at me, the haze in her eyes, the fast pace of her chest as it rose and fell with rapid, out-of-control breaths. “What’s the point of asking me all this anyway?”
“To give you some hope,” he says. “Tell me. How serious are you about this girl?”
If I had a choice in the matter, I never would’ve chosen to feel this way about Andrew’s older sister. Leticia is vexing and intriguing and downright bullheaded at times. She’s also full of surprises. We’re more alike than she even knows, but her brother is a complication our tentative relationship can’t afford. Andrew’s the last person I should be admitting this to—even if he has no idea I’m talking about his sister.
“I think she could really be it for me,” I tell him. “If she gave me half the chance, that is. I don’t think she hates me nearly as much as she acts like she does, but I’m also not sure how she sees me, which is inconvenient, since I’m half in love with her already. All I want to know is if I still have a chance with her.”
“Okay, then.” He says. “What are you going to do about it?”
I don’t answer him. I down the rest of my coffee and leave, even when he yells after me for leaving him hanging. The bedroom door closes behind me, a strange sort of determination heating my blood. What are the chances Leti feels even a shred of what I feel for her back? Whether she’s willing to admit it to herself or not?
One thing is clear to me now more than ever—the next time I get a chance to kiss Leticia, there won’t be anything almost about it.
20
Leti
A call interrupts the audiobook I’m listening to right before the two heroines are about to fuck. Elena’s name flashes on my car’s screen.This better be good.It’s not like my sister to call this early on a workday morning. She must have just dropped Alicia off at school.
“What’s up?”
“Oh, good. I caught you before you went in to work,” she says, though she’s only marginally right. I’m about to turn into the school parking lot. “Don’t make plans for October fifteenth.”
“What’s happening October fifteenth?”
“Please tell me you’re joking.”
“It’s not your birthday. It’s not your anniversary. It’s notmybirthday. Not Mom’s or Dad’s. Who…”Oh no.“Crap. It’s Andrew, isn’t it?”
“That took youwaylonger to realize than it should have.”
I can practically feel her disappointment oozing through the car speaker.
“Leti—”
“Save the lecture for when I have time for it. You have two minutes before I have to rush out of the car to subyet again, because apparently that’s what this job has turned into.” I wouldn’t mindbeing a few minutes late, actually. Maybe they’ll look for a substitute somewhere else if I’m nowhere to be found.
She cuts to the chase. “We’re planning a surprise party. I’m about to make the group chat. And donotleave this group like you left the last one.”
I only left the last group chat because my parents decided to recap the disastrous events of my quinceañera to Diego. I couldn’t stand the way they’d twisted events and acted like it was some funny anecdote to recount when they still haven’t forgiven me for something that wasn’t my fault. “He’s our brother. The least you can do is pretend you care about him.”
“Ouch.” My tone is sarcastic, but the blow lands like a dead weight. When we were younger, Elena was always firmly on my side when it came to the fights I had with Andrew. Then we became adults, and the more I stood up for myself the harder I became to defend. When our parents scolded me to be nicer (though I’m sure they said shit to Andrew), to let his comments go quietly, totrymore with him, she went radio silent. These days, I can’t help but wonder if she agrees with them underneath her silence.
“Leti, I’m begging you.” She sighs. “I know how he is, but you have to come through for him on this. No more fake illnesses.”
“Fine.” I grit my teeth. “Whatever. Put me in the stupid group chat.”
I hang up without saying goodbye, then let out a groan that vibrates my chest before pulling myself out of the car. For no reason at all, tears sting my eyes. Elena doesn’t understand. It’s easier when Andrew and I aren’t in the same room. We can’t do each other any harm that way. It’s why I’ve tried to pull back from him since we became adults, but Elena has a special way of reeling me back in. She’s the only one I can’t say no to, a fact everyone knows good and well.
My phone vibrates in my pocket during first period, but I don’tcheck my notifications until lunch. The phone nearly slips from my hand after reading through the first few messages.
Elena:Hello all! I’m planning a surprise party for Andrew on October 15th. Here’s a screenshot that lists everything we still need. Let me know if you can bring anything, and if you have any thoughts/ideas for the party!
