But maybe, I thought, clutching at his hair and pressing my lips to his pulse point as he moved inside me, it would be worth it. Because even if he did hurt me in the end, I would have these memories of him, precious and perfect – something I did just for myself.
‘Can I ask one more thing?’ I asked afterwards, as we held each other close, trying to catch our breath.
‘Of course.’ Satoshi reached over and snagged the sake carafe and our cups, handing me mine. ‘Anything.’
‘Do you mind if we keep this to ourselves?’
He had been about to refill my cup, but he stilled. ‘You want it to be a secret?’
‘Not a secret, exactly. But for a while, can this just be… ours?’
I stroked the side of his face. ‘Everything’s so simple, when it’s just you and me,’ I whispered. ‘And I have the kids to think about. They’ve already been through so much upheaval, and they’re about to go through more, seeing Matt again. I…’
‘You have to be careful.’
I nodded, grateful that he didn’t make me spell it out. ‘So can it just be us for a bit? Before we throw the world at it?’
Satoshi took a long breath and let it out slowly before he answered.
‘Of course, Fiona,’ he said. ‘Whatever you want. Whatever you need. Whatever you can offer – I want it.’
JANUARY
Chapter FourteenSatoshi
Tasting today: seventeen-year-old single-malt whisky, Yamanashi prefecture, Japan.
A classic whisky made in the Scottish style: everything in balance, flavours restrained, completely and utterly in control. Perfect at the end of a long (long) day.
FIONA
Happy New Year, Satoshi xxx
Hope the party at the bar went well!!
SATOSHI
It did
Although it would have been much better if you’d been here to kiss at midnight xx
FIONA
I wish I could have been, but Elias flew back to Germany yesterday, and asking Jonah and Sadie to babysit on NYE might have been a bit much
I ended up babysitting for them instead
Fiona sent a photo.
[Photo: Rosie and Georgia, playing with Bunbury.]
SATOSHI
I ended up babysitting *them*
Satoshi sent a photo.
[Photo: Jonah and Sadie, kissing at midnight.]
