‘You’re very welcome.’
‘And for what it’s worth,’ she said, ‘I see you.’
I blinked.
‘I sure as hell saw you yesterday morning making out with hot day spa Kieran like your lives depended on it.’ Mischief sparkled in her eyes. ‘There I was, minding my own business, innocently heading down to the bakery, thinking,Oh, I’ll just cut through that alleyway next to Tsundoku,and—’
‘Stop,’ I groaned.
‘I’m assuming you’re either the black sheep of the Tsukamoto family or you don’t know whatdemonstrativemeans.’ Fiona poked me playfully in the arm. ‘Because you, my friend, are clearly very demonstrative.’
I didn’t fall in love with her that day either. But later that night, lying beside my beautiful boyfriend, aware that no matter how much I tried to demonstrate my love to him, it was fading away, those three words echoed in my mind:I see you.
The eighty-second time I didn’t fall in love with Fiona
‘Isamu, will you just listen to me?’ I said. ‘I understand what you’re saying. But—’
‘But you want to do it anyway.’ Isamu folded his arms over his chest. I was several inches taller than him, but he was twice as wide across the shoulders, and he always managed to look down at me somehow, in a way that made me feel every second of our twelve-year age difference. ‘Even though it makes no financial sense. Even though you categorically do not need to be an MS to run this place. Even though it’ll mean working yourself to the bone – you want to do itanyway?’
‘Yes.’
Isamu pinched the bridge of his nose. ‘Sato, this is ridiculous. Why would you—’
The door opened. ‘Sorry, Satoshi, I know it’s not quite two yet, but—’ Fiona paused, looking between us. ‘Am I interrupting?’
‘No.’ I beckoned her inside. ‘I’m about to open, and Isamu was just leaving.’
My brother glared at me. ‘We’re not finished talking about this.’
‘You can talk as much as you want. I’m not going to change my mind. Take a seat, Fiona – I have some new things I want your opinion on.’
I poured her a splash of a Slovenian orange field blend as Isamu, with one last grunt of displeasure, left. ‘Do you want to talk about whatever that was?’ Fiona asked. ‘I was only popping in to see if any of those books I ordered for Lex had arrived, but they’re on camp, Matt’s in Melbourne for work, and the girls are going straight from school to a sleepover. I’ve got time.’
‘There’s not that much to tell.’ I took another glass down and poured a splash of the orange wine for myself. ‘I told Isamu I’m going to sit the MS.’
‘The MS?’
‘The Master Sommelier exam. The highest qualification you can get in wine. It’ll be a lot of work – it’s the hardest exam in the world, it’s got a pass rate of about five per cent – but I’ve wanted to do it for as long as I can remember. It’s the whole reason I went back overseas to work. I didn’twantto leave home, not when I finally had one, but I knew I had to if I wanted to get enough serious experience. I’ve basically been preparing for this my whole life.’ I swirled the wine in my glass. ‘But Isamu doesn’t think I should do it. Doesn’t think Ican.’
‘Did he say that?’
‘Not in so many words, but…’ I paused. ‘I was more… fragile, when I was younger. Anxious. All the moving around did a number on me, and even after my father died and we settled here for good, I used to have panic attacks. I don’t anymore – I did a lot of therapy, and I’ve got strategies to manage it now – but in Isamu’s mind, I’m still a delicate little flower.’
‘Is that why you want to do the exam? To show him you’re not?’
‘No. Wine isn’t just the family business to me. It’s genuinely my passion.’
‘I know,’ she murmured, an unreadable expression crossing her face for a moment. ‘I know how passionate you are.’
‘But if I’m being honest – proving myself is starting to becomea bigger part of the reason.’ I exhaled. ‘Isamu’s not wrong. I don’tneedto be an MS to run Tsundoku. But I want to be one. I want to prove – to him, and to everyone – that I can do it.’
Fiona tapped her fingers against the foot of her glass for a few moments before she spoke again. ‘Is it weird to say that I completely get it and also don’t get it at all?’
‘A bit, yes,’ I said. ‘Explain.’
‘Have I told you much about my family? Not Matt and the kids, I mean – my parents? My brothers?’
‘A little. They’re in Sydney, right? Where you grew up?’
