‘It wasn’t that bad, was it?’
‘I’m sorry to tell you this, Mandie, but yes. It was a very awkward kiss.’
She closed her eyes and banged her head a couple of times against the bathroom cabinets. ‘Don’t listen to me,’ she said. ‘I’m sure it was fine. I was just jealous.’
‘Jealous?’
‘In case I’ve been too subtle,’ she said, opening one eye, ‘I’d much rather be the one kissing you.’
‘If we’re being honest,’ I said, ‘I’d much rather have been kissing you too.’
I wanted to make her smile, but instead she sighed. ‘This is a huge fucking mess, Mandie,’ she said. ‘Not just for us. For man-Dylan too. I’m almost positive there’s someone here he actually likes, but he’s just as stuck as I am.’
‘There’s no way out of it?’
‘No,’ she said. ‘We both signed our lives away. There’s the NDA, to start with, so if we talk about any of it we can both be sued. But they’re paying me too. A shit-ton of money. Enough that I won’t have to go back to nursing for years. I won’t have to risk catching the virus, which means I can have Noah home with me.’
Her voice cracked again, and a tear ran down her cheek. ‘I miss him so much,’ she said. ‘I’d do anything for him. Anything. I thought coming here and pretending to fall in love with Dylan JM would be easy. I had all these ideas about how I’d use my new platform to be a public health influencer,so I could still help people even if I wasn’t on the frontlines anymore. I had it all worked out. But I didn’t count on – I didn’t count on—’
‘Me,’ I said.
‘I’ve been falling for you so hard, Mandie,’ she whispered, turning to face me. ‘I’ve been trying to pretend it away, but I can’t. That was why I didn’t tell you I was into women, even after you told me. If I put that out into the universe, you and I would suddenly become this possibility, and I couldn’t let that happen.’
I turned my face to hers. We were almost nose to nose, leaning back against the cabinet.
She trailed her fingers down the side of my face, stroking my damp hair behind my ear. ‘You’re like this ray of sunshine,’ she said. ‘Proper sunshine, not city sunshine, where it’s filtered through all that pollution and smog. Pure, clear, clean sunshine that warms you up, right down to the bone. Even that first day I met you, when you were so sad, I just wanted to be near you.’
‘To sunbake?’ I said, reaching up and hooking my fingers through hers.
‘You joke, but honestly, kind of,’ she said. ‘I haven’t had a friend like you in a long time, Mandie. A ride-or-die. And I managed to convince myself that was all it was until that fucking love machine date.’
I blinked. ‘What?’
‘When you built that catapult out of, like, three pipe cleaners and a blade of grass? And it worked perfectly? Babe, I’ve never been that turned on in my life.’
‘Are you telling me,’ I said, ‘that love machines actuallywork?’
She laughed. ‘Actually, I’m lying a little bit,’ she said. ‘Sure, the love machine really turned my crank, but it wasn’t the first time. Seeing how much that fancy car turnedyourcrank also turned mine quite a lot.’
‘Considering you have a massive in with production,’ I said, ‘can you find out where that Lambo is? I hate to think of her languishing all alone. I’d take such good care of her.’
Her gaze was liquid. ‘I’m sure you would,’ she whispered.
Then her eyes drifted downward. ‘Oh, hello.’
‘Shit, sorry,’ I said, pulling my towel back together. ‘This is what happens when you don’t give me time to get dressed, Dylan.’
‘Stop.’
I stopped.
Her fingers traced the seam of the towel. ‘Can I?’
I swallowed.
‘You can say no,’ she said. ‘That’s totally fine, Mandie. I absolutely understand why you would say no. I’m contractually bound to man-Dylan, and I know you’re not all the way over Jac, and this whole situation is the hugest fucking mess in the world. If we want to stay friends, then doing this is probably the worst thing we could do.’
‘Probably,’ I said.
