“Shut up,” snaps Nash at his brother. “June, who else have you talked to? Has Carrie been on to you?”
“No. I don’t care about their money, and I haven’t talked to anyone else.” I take a deep breath and let it out slow. “I just wanted to pick my time and work out how to tell you what happened.”
“She does have a habit of rehearsing speeches in her head,” says Grandma. “It’s an anxiety thing.”
“Did you take his business card?” asks Angus. Like it proves something.
“He shoved it at me. So what?”
“You had no trouble taking the black credit card yesterday either. Then there’s the brand-new luxury vehicle you’re cruising around town in.”
And Nash is watching me like I might bite or something. Like he isn’t sure who I am anymore or whether he should trust me. It feels sort of similar to having my heart dug out with a rusty spoon.
“I know these people have messed with you in the past,” I say. “That others have sold stories about you to the media and betrayed you in horrible ways. However, I am not one of them.”
“The kind of money we’re talking about can’t just be taken for granted,” says Angus. “It’s not like she’s rich.”
“So, what…I don’t even get the benefit of the doubt here?” I ask.
“It really would have been better to tell him right away,” says Charlie with his gray brows drawn down.
And Nash says nothing. He sits there staring at me with a blank face and a shuttered gaze. As if every emotion in him has disappeared. I doubt there’s even anything I could say right nowto make this better. I can’t believe this is happening. Any trust he ever had in me is gone, apparently.
“I know we haven’t known each other long,” I say, trying to stay calm. “And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you straight away. But surely you know me better than this.”
His mouth opens, but nothing comes out. I can feel my heart shutting down and my soul giving up. I wanted us to be forever and we’re not even going to survive breakfast.
“What utter bullshit,” says Grandma, getting to her feet. “Get out of here, you three. The only person welcome in my house right now is my granddaughter. I don’t want to see the rest of you for a while.”
Charlie frowns. “Aud—”
“Get out!”
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Ididn’t know I had this many tears in me. More than sufficient for an hour crying on the bathroom floor. And it’s given me a bitch of a headache. Time to take some aspirin and pull myself together.
So I made a mistake and should have told him about Farmer straight away. Nash is an adult who doesn’t need someone protecting his happy. The part where he didn’t even give me the benefit of the doubt, however, is a sharp and jagged thing inside of me. If we can come apart so easily…if his belief in me is so fragile…then we don’t belong together. And it’s better to find this out sooner rather than later.
Grandma curses up a storm as she packs Charlie and Angus’s gear and throws it into the front garden. They are most definitely being evicted. She says she hates men. She especially hates these three men in particular. And she sincerely wishes they would fuck off to outer space and never be seen again.
Seems I rehearse speeches in my head when I’m anxious and Grandma talks to herself when she’s angry. There’s an interesting array of foibles in our family.
My face is a stark and swollen pink in the bathroom mirror. The way my eyes look like they’re about to explode. Stupid, idiotic, unnecessary love. I’m probably better off without it. I mean, what have I really lost here? Someone who I thought was my person, who made my life better in a myriad of ways and who I wanted to be with forever. Happiness and great sex and good conversation and laughter. He’s a stellar hugger too.
Though, I don’t need him and none of it matters if he thinks I would sell him out so easily. Therefore, I am fine and moving on to a bigger and brighter future minus any famous musicians.Just as soon as I lock myself back in the bathroom to cry some more. Might take a bottle of wine or a pitcher of margaritas in with me this time. It honestly can’t hurt.
“What the hell is happening here?” asks Sabrina, coming through the front door.
And behind her is Rose. “Saw someone’s stuff being thrown into the garden and thought we should check things out.”
Grandma takes a deep breath and stands tall. “That idiot of a rockstar upset her. Look at the state of her.”
So I’m sort of rumpled and ruddy-faced. There’s no need to make a big thing out of it.
“What did he do?” asks Isa, entering the room still wearing her apron from the café. Guess she left work in a hurry.
Rose shrugs. “I activated the phone tree. It felt like an emergency. Carmen is picking up supplies in Seattle and won’t be here for a few hours, and Amy is stuck teaching a cross-stitch class. They both send their love though.”
