“I apologize, Your Highness. I’ll—”
She harrumphed. “Passive as ever. I don’t know how I ever took you for a man. What is it you want?”
My shoulders squared at her insult. “I asked Edan to kill me if ever I should lose control. But I don’t believe he will.”
Now she leaned forward, interested.
I took a deep breath. “I want you to complete the task if hefails.”
An elegant eyebrow arched, and she sat on one of her trunks, her back rigid. “I knew what you were the moment I saw you. I’ve known it since you made me put on that cursed dress and nearly killed me.”
I bowed my head.
“But no real demon would give up the secret of how to kill her. That is why I gave Edan back his dagger. Why I let you live. But your days are numbered, Tamarin.”
“I’m not—”
“Don’t interrupt me. You haven’t the right, and I haven’t finished speaking.” She flexed her sword hand, and her frown deepened.
“I’ve told you what magic did to my father,” she said. “I witnessed him transform from the emperor’s most loyal general to a traitor desirous of power above all else. He thinks he is in control of the demon at his side, but Gyiu’rak has him fooled. She will bleed him dry; it is her nature—a demon’s nature. And I see it in your eyes.”
Her voice turned cold. “You cannot control it if you are weak.”
Weak?my demon voice spluttered in disbelief.Yes, you are weak. But only for resisting. Imagine, Sentur’na, what you could do for A’landi if you gave in. You would truly be Gyiu’rak’s match. You would—
Go away.I snuffed the voice with my mind.I’ll not listen toyou.
“Why did you come back?” I asked Sarnai. “You said there was no chance of beating your father.”
“There isn’t,” she said. “But better I lead A’landi against him thanyou.”
It was meant to be an insult, but I did not flinch. “Then you’ve given me a reason to be glad of what I am becoming.”
I didn’t give her a chance to respond. Spying the ash bow behind her, I gestured at it. “When I was impersonating you, your father said it was a testament of your strength.”
Lady Sarnai ignored the bow and sniffed. “My brothers were trained from birth to be warriors, something I wanted above all else. My father said I could train with them if I could draw his bow. He knew it was an impossible feat, even for my brothers. I could throw a knife and hit a dragonfly from a hundred meters away and stomach the poisons that my brothers meant for each other and slipped me instead, but I did not have enough strength to draw the bow even halfway. My father only thought of me as a pawn to be married off.
“I wouldn’t have it. So I joined my mother for embroidery and dancing lessons, but at night, I went into the woods and carried logs on my back from the forest to the castle to build strength.
“I did this for half a year, until my soft hands grew rough, my back stopped aching from the weight, and my bones grew strong. When my father found out that his only daughter, the Jewel of the North, was doing hard labor in the middle of the night, he ordered the woodsman hanged. What good would I be to him if my beauty was compromised? I could hardly become an empress if my face was scarred and splinters marked my skin.”
She touched her cheek. The violet bruises were faded, all but ghosts against the flush of winter on her cheeks. The silver-white scars on her skin were there to stay, prominent reminders of her encounter with my dresses, but they weren’t what must have chased away the soft elegance she once had as a young girl. War and loss were to blame for that.
She drew a breath. “But I stole my father’s bow and drew it, easily, as if I’d been pulling a sash around my robe, and my arrow cut the woodsman free.
“I was allowed to join my brothers from then on. When I bested them all, my father gave me to Lord Xina to train.” She trailed off, pursing her lips. “Then to Khanujin to marry.”
A long silence fell between us. Finally, I broke it by asking, “Are you relieved he is dead?”
“Khanujin was not a good emperor. Not even a good man.” She lingered, as if what she wanted to say next vexed her. “But I thought about what you said, tailor, and there was truth to your words. Much as I hated him, he put A’landi before all else. Now that I see it, I have no choice but to respect him.” Her expression turned grim. “So, yes, I am relieved that he is dead, but I wish he weren’t. Now his burdens fall to us.”
Us.
“Perhaps even he, the emperor we both came to loathe, had some good in him after all.”
“I wouldn’t go that far,” Lady Sarnai scoffed. But, for once, she had no harsh words to say about Khanujin.
“You’re an odd one, Tamarin,” she said after a pause. “Perhaps in a different life we might have been friends. But not in this one.”
