I winced as I wrote that line. But frankly, it was true.
Upon making contact with the small contingent of Runam inhabitants, who had built a small settlement in the habitable zone of this planet, I became friends with them. I fell in love with a woman here, and the only reason I reached out to you was to protect her and these people, whom have come to be important to me. If you wish for monetary compensation, I can pay you from what is left of my saved credits. The merchant operation you are referring to is not mine, but that of a Greblin trader who has been operating in this system for many years. If you have further questions, ask. But to be clear, I have no financial interest in what happens here. But I will fight to the death to save these people.
I hit send with a haze of red over my vision and both hearts beating faster than they should have been. And then I thought about what I had just sent and wished I could rip it right back out of the air. Or the void, which was where it was now, zipping through space toward its recipients, who would likely think that I had completely lost my mind. Perhaps I had. I sighed and shut off the console. I would likely never hear back from the guild again, but they had given me good information. Perhaps we had a little more time, since obviously the Durbok was pushing back on the Rivonok’s push into the system. I welcomed any small impediment to their progress.
Chapter
Twenty-Three
Don’t waste what you have
By sunset,I was at Maive’s door yet again. I swear I had memorized the grooves in the wood by heart. I knew exactly what the surface felt like beneath my knuckles, and this time, I didn’t even get one knock out before the door was open and she stood there, beautiful in a dark blue tunic and matching flowing pants. Her feet were bare.
“Come in,” she said, beckoning me inside. There were a few people in the pathway behind me, and nobody looked twice as I entered the stone building.
She led me upstairs into her private quarters. The smell of spices, fish, and bread flooded my senses. I had no idea I loved food as much as I did until I had access to regular, good-tasting meals.
“Smells amazing,” I murmured, noting that one of the rooms off the sitting area appeared to be a kitchen of some sort.
“Thank you. As I’ve said, I’m a fair cook. My late partner was better, but—” She cut off with a shake of her head. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to mention him.”
“It’s fine,” I said gently. “Don’t pretend he didn’t exist to spare me something. He made you happy. I like him for that reason alone.”
Everything about her face seemed to soften at that. I appeared to have a decent knack for saying the right things to her. Sometimes, anyway.
She set out bowls of soup, bread, and a bottle of crisp, green wine that was delicious and went well with the seafood soup she had prepared. The broth was rich, and the flavors melded beautifully.
“You’re better than a fair cook,” I said, scraping the last bits of seaweed and a plump mussel onto my spoon. “This rivals Braija’s cooking.”
“Oh, don’t tell her that,” Maive said with a chuckle. “It would take her years to forgive you. And me.”
We chatted as we finished eating and sipped our wine. I told her what the guild had relayed to me that day about the Durbok’s interference, but I omitted the part that came after.
Maive’s brows knitted. “Would it be very costly to hire the guild to protect us?”
I nodded. It was a thought I’d had. In fact, it had been one of my first. “Yes,” was the honest answer. “Most of the clients the guild takes on are not individuals or small groups like this, but huge, well-funded organizations and governments. The guild pays its mercenaries very well, which is why they charge exorbitantly for our skills.” I shook my head. “I’ve saved considerable credits over the years, but not enough to afford them.” I hesitated before voicing the rest. “The only bargaining chip you would have would be thejunversyrup. But to offer that to the guild as compensation would put you in the same situation that you’d be in with the Rivonok.” My hand tightened on the earthenware cup that held my half-drunk wine. “The guild does not operate on altruism. They would take over thejunversyrup production. You would produce it for them with nothing in return and with similar coercion. I wish that were not the case, but I know my former life well.” I shook my head. “One oppressor or the other. I couldn’t even tell you which would be worse.”
She dropped her gaze and nodded, accepting what I had to say. I really did wish it could be otherwise. But I knew better than to try to appeal to the mercenary guild’s compassion. They had none. They were a business, just like any of the syndicates and cartels and merchant alliances and all the others that had hired us to do terrible things.
I took a sip of wine and set it down awkwardly. “I’m sorry. I fear I’ve ruined the evening.”
“No, you haven’t. I welcome any updates. And this wasn’t a bad one. I’m glad that they’ve been slowed down, at least.”
I shrugged. “There is that.”
She set her cup down deliberately and looked up at me. “I will be honest with you, Gilrox,” she began. “I don’t know how much time we have here, and I don’t know what the outcome of all this will be. Our time together may be short.”
I stayed quiet, sensing that she was gearing up to say something significant.
“One or both of us may not survive this. We may be separated. Any number of things could happen.” Her gaze lifted, locked on mine. “So I will just say this as plainly as I can. I want you to take me to my bed, Gilrox. We have right now. We may not have the future. I’m not a fan of regrets.”
My brain took a few beats to process what she’d said, even though yes, it was very plain. “I just want to make sure I understand.” I gestured toward her bedroom. “You want me to take you in there?”
“That’s what I said.”
“There are many forms of regret,” I said, placing down my own cup and trying to keep my voice even. “I wouldn’t want this choice to be one of them.”
“I could not regret feeling alive,” she said after a moment. “I would rather have experiences than spend the rest of my life wondering what it would have been like.” She tilted her head. “Does that make sense?”
