Page 128 of In Love and Revenge

‘Come and shower with me?’ he rasps.

My gaze drops to the scar running down his chest. There’s still so much he’s not telling me. Tonight is just another example of how he can’t open up and let me in. How are we supposed to have a relationship if he won’t be honest with me?

I shake my head. ‘I don’t want to.’

‘Fine,’ he hisses. ‘Suit your bloody self.’

He strides past me in just his underwear and slams the bathroom door behind him. I pace up and down in front of the balcony doors in his bedroom. He never opens them, but everything about tonight has got my blood racing. I’m hot and clammy and need air.

Unlocking them, I swing both open, stepping out. The cool night air on my skin is a welcome companion, and I take a couple of deep breaths as I walk to a thick metal railing that runs around the edge between wide concrete pillars. The garden spreads out beneath, the scent of jasmine bushes tinting the air with sweetness.

The pillars are wide with flat tops. Plenty of space to climb up, sit, and soak in the calming silence of the night. I settle myself on one, bringing my feet up and wrapping my arms around my legs as I wait for the sound of the shower to stop inside.

Five minutes later Rafael appears in the open doorway with a towel wrapped around his waist, his hair wet and tousled.

‘Get down,’ he whispers. ‘Aurora, get down and come here.’

I sigh and avert my eyes from his, back over the garden. ‘It’s so pretty. Why don’t you ever come out here?’

‘Get the fuck down!’

I whip my head around, ready to give him hell for thinking he can speak like that and order me around. But the sight of him stops me dead.

He’s clutching either side of the doorframe, his face contorted like he’s in agony.

‘What’s wrong?’ I slide off the pillar to go to him, but he’s already coming for me.

He grabs me in his arms, pulling me back on to the balcony. The force of my body crashes into his and he brings us both down on to the ground.

He slumps with his back against the pillar and bundles me on to his lap, the grip of his arms around my torso almost suffocating.

His entire body is shaking.

‘You ... could ...’ His chest heaves against my back as he struggles to speak, like something is tearing him up inside.

‘You’re holding me too tight,’ I wheeze.

‘You could have ... fallen,’ he chokes out.

The panic in his voice makes my throat burn. ‘What?’ I wriggle inside his grip until I can turn and look at his face.

Tears are streaming down his cheeks, and his lips are parted as he drags in rough, uneven breaths. ‘Aur—’

‘Shh. You’re okay. Don’t try to talk. Just breathe, okay? I’m here.’

I cup his cheek and look into his eyes. He winces and lifts one hand to his chest, rubbing it.

‘What is it? What’s wrong?’

He grabs my hand, placing it over his scar. His heart is beating wildly, racing like he’s just sprinted for his life.

His face is pale and clammy, his eyes have lost focus.

‘Breathe with me, okay?’ I instruct, keeping my hand over his chest and my eyes locked on his. I take his hand and place it over my chest so he can feel it moving up and down as I breathe.

It takes everything in me to keep my breathing slow and steady and not panic at the sheer terror in his eyes.

‘In,’ I whisper, breathing in slowly and encouraging him to do the same. ‘And out.’ I blow out a slow, long breath, nodding encouragingly as the whites around his eyes become less pronounced and his breathing levels out.