“Never took you for a snorer.I hope you kept AJ up all night,” my seat-mate, Bradley, says to me.
“I bet he did other stuff to keep him up all night,” Jackson butts in, raising suspicious eyebrows.
“Hey, if that’s your master plan.I’m down for it.All is fair in love and football, right?”Bradley says.
“I’m not confirming or denying anything.I will say, though, he’s going to be much more tired than me.”
“My guy!”Bradley says, smacking me on the back.
Being able to be free and open about who I am has untied another knot in my stomach.They’re taking me as I am, as any human with common sense and decency should.I will never understand the hate people get for being born different.For those who do—and I know there are some on social media, and there will be even more once AJ and I “come out” publicly—they can cry me a river.
It’s hot on the training pitch.Like,reallyhot.The management team has provided us all with bottles of ice water, and we’re now doing lighter training in the shade.My legs are itching for a run.I know there’s going to be no shade in the stadium, and I know it’s going to be a tough game.It’ll be about the fine margins.And if I know AJ, which I do very well, he’s going to try and one up me.I will encourage it as it will be even more sweet knowing he gave it his all, and still comes up short against me.
I soak a towel and wrap it around the top of my head.“I need to stretch my legs,” I say to one of the assistant managers before sprinting off.The warm air hits my face as I run around the training field.I speed past my teammates as they practice defense drills and shooting practice.There’ll be time for that later for me.My manager has told me to work on penalties.Just the word gives me anxiety.I’m over what AJ did or didn’t do last season—for what it’s worth, I believe that he tripped—but the act of taking one in a high-pressure game scares the shit out of me.I can sense it coming down to penalties.I don’t let my mind think any further than that.
Chapter 38
AJ
Game day.Cup final.Dream come true.
There’s a weird knot of tension in me, partly because I haven’t been able to see Kyle in a few days.We said it would be best to keep apart and focus on the match, in case the media think we’re “throwing the final;” and on the subject of the media, despite all my bravado, I’m a little worried about the ramifications.The cup final itself, I’m not worried about.I was built for high-pressure situations like this.All the preparations are now done, and all that’s left is to leave it all on the pitch.
I sleep like a baby, thanks to putting on my “rain sounds” playlist via my phone.I wake up feeling refreshed and ready for the biggest match of my career so far.Kyle is on my mind.His smile.His touch.His eyes.They were all I could think about in my sleep.I open my phone up, take off the rain sounds, and shoot him a quick text, knowing he will be up like me.
AJ
Good luck today, Ky.For everything.xxx
He Who rocks My??
You too.xxx
I put my phone away to avoid any unwanted distractions and hop in the shower.
By the time I get out, it’s a mad dash to get ready and meet the team for breakfast in our private area of the hotel.I’ve never been great with timings, that’s always been Ky’s thing.I make it by the skin of my teeth, taking a seat next to Captain Smith.
“Practicing making a late run into the box, are we?”He laughs.
“Something like that,” I say, getting up and remembering it’s a buffet.I opt for fruit and juices.
The morning goes by in a haze.I don’t remember much after breakfast or how long I spent in my room.All I can recall is Gaffer knocking on my hotel door asking if I was ready.Nothing seems quite so real as I head toward the stadium with my teammates.
The stadium is beautiful, a cylindrical steel bowl that will be holding fifty thousand fans this evening under the lights.I’ve watched a few games during the domestic season in this stadium, both live and on TV.The atmosphere is always thunderous.Something to do with the architecture makes each noise much louder.I walk around the stadium, taking it all in and savoring every moment.I look across from the other side of the pitch, and by some sort of cosmic force, I see Kyle.Our eyes meet at the same time, and we smile at each other.
Kyle
Every time he smiles at me, he sends a shiver down my spine.He pulls a face, and I have to stop myself from laughing.God, he’s walked back into my life, turned it upside down, and shone a light in the darkness.I was hoping to see him before kickoff, and knew he would want to take in the stadium like me.
This will be the last time we see each other, though, until kick off later this evening.I sent Mum tickets to the game, but she hasn’t told me if she could make it or not, and there’s still been no update from Dad.I need to shake all of it out of my mind and focus on the match.As horrible as it sounds, I need to close myself off from all distractions.AJ included.I’m being paid to score goals.I’m being paid to use my “gift” and I can’t do that if I can’t focus.
Mr.Robins is going over tactics in the locker room.Everyone is laser focused.There’s no music playing from mini speakers, no phones out, nothing.“...And this is how we spring the attack,” he says, pointing at his tactics board.It’s a zig-zag movement we’ve been working on in training.I personally think he’s watched a little too muchTheMighty Ducks, with thatFlying Vformation.
Sure, the formation is a little different, but the principle is exactly the same.We’ve executed it well in training, but it is totally different in a real game scenario.I trust him, though.Nothing he has ever said to us has been wrong.“Finally, go out there and have fun.That’s why you play football, right?For fun.That’s why you’re paid what you are.That’s why you train so hard.That’s why you’ve made all these sacrifices.You go out there and enjoy yourselves.You’ll have most of the city cheering you on, and millions of people watching you from around the world.So don’t forget to play with that smile on your face.”
“Here here!”we chant and stomp our feet.
AJ
