By the time I get out of bed and get dressed, I’m fuming. How dare he talk to my parents and make up lies about me? Threaten my relationship. It may be new, but it’s the healthiest relationship I’ve ever had.
Quickly checking the time, I shove my phone in my back pocket and walk towards the kitchen to see if Ryan’s back from his run. If not, I can at least make coffee so it will be ready for him. I can’t wait for him to read this email—there’s no way I’m keeping it from him.
As I approach, I can hear hushed voices. I don’t want to interrupt a private conversation, so maybe I should wait in the bedroom until Ryan comes to get me. I’m about to leave when I hear my name. Pausing, I stand out of sight just beyond the door and listen.
“When you told me she looked like Lily, I thought you were exaggerating,” William says.
“I know.”
“Her long black hair. Her bright blue eyes. Even some of her mannerisms.”
“When I first met her, it was like seeing a ghost. But other than appearance, they don’t have much in common.”
“How are you feeling about all this?” his granddad asks, concern in his voice. “You always said a relationship wasn’t something you wanted.”
I shouldn’t be listening to this. Not waiting for Ryan’s response, I quickly turn to leave and bump into a table. An ornamental vase topples, and thankfully I catch it before it shatters into a million pieces on the floor. It would probably take an entire year’s worth of wages to replace it. I’m still holding it when Ryan rounds the corner to investigate.
“Hey.” He grins, glancing down at the vase. “Are you okay?”
“Oh, yeah. Sorry. Just clumsy,” I say, carefully placing it back on the table and stepping away.
“I was going to come and get you. Are you hungry? Granddad was saying he was thinking about making French toast.”
“Actually, I’m not feeling great. I have a headache, and I feel nauseous,” I say, dropping my hands over my stomach. “Do you think we can skip breakfast and go home? I need my own bed.”
My father’s email feels irrelevant now. The last thing I want is to be here with someone who’s making comparisons between me and the love of Ryan’s life, knowing I’ll fall short.
I flinch when Ryan reaches for me and places his cold hand over my forehead and looks me up and down. “Are you okay? Are you getting sick?” he asks quickly.
“I’m fine,” I reassure him. I should have considered Ryan’s feelings when I invented my excuse to leave. “I’m sure it’s nothing. Maybe I’m just overtired.”
“Is everything all right?” William peers around the doorframe.
“Lily’s sick.”
My stomach clenches, and my breath stutters. If I wasn’t feeling unwell before, I am now.
His eyes widen, and he inhales sharply through his nose at his misstep. “Fuck.” He reaches for my hand and whispers, “I’m so sorry.”
Turning to his granddad, he clears his throat and says, “Beck isn’t feeling good.”
“Oh.” William looks at me with concern. “What’s wrong? Can I get you anything?”
“No, I’m fine. Really, I am,” I say in a rush. “I was asking Ryan if we could go home early. I’m sure I’ll feel better once I get a good night’s sleep in my bed.”
I watch his face fall, and my heart sinks. I don’t want to interrupt their visit when I know it’s so important to them both. Fuck my life. Why am I like this? I can keep it together for a few more hours. I’m about to say so when Ryan slips his arm aroundme and pulls me closer, placing a kiss on the top of my head and inhaling deeply.
“Let’s go home. I can pick you up some soup at Maggie’s. That will make you feel better.”
“Can I make you some tea and toast for the road trip home? Something to help settle your stomach?” William asks.
My eyes water at his kindness. It’s not his fault I was eavesdropping. I may be overreacting, but I need to be alone in my space so I can process my feelings.
“I would appreciate that, William. Thank you.”
Thirty-Seven
Something is wrong. Beck was sleepy when I left her in bed earlier this morning, but she seemed okay. What changed while I was away? I was barely gone an hour, cutting my run short so I could get back to her. I was hoping she would join me in the shower, to be honest.
