Page 200 of The Song We Lost

He laughs and I smile slightly as he steps beside me. The air between us feels different now.

Not heavy anymore, but still weighted. Full of all the questions we still haven't addressed.

Luke shoves his hands into his pockets before glancing down toward the grass and suddenly he looks nervous. That alone nearly makes me laugh.

“What?” I ask softly.

His eyes lift to mine slowly, as he asks, “What do you want to do about us?”

I have been waiting for this question to come. Knowing at some point he would need to know where we stand, we both need to know. But I wanted to be sure about how I was feeling before I approached it. The divorce still hangs unfinished between us like the last ugly thread connecting us to the worst version of our marriage.

Luke swallows hard. “I meant what I said,” he tells me quietly. “About therapy. About doing the work properly together if… if that’s something you want.”

I stare at him for a long moment. At the man standing in front of me now. Not the broken version from last year or the ghost who disappeared inside addiction and fame.

This Luke.

The one who came back. The one who held me up when I was ready to fall.MyLuke.

“I’ve been thinking about it,” I admit softly.

His whole body stills. “And?”

I take a shaky breath. “I can’t imagine loving anyone else.”

Emotion flashes so hard across his face it nearly undoes me. “Bailey…”

“I’m still hurt,” I whisper quickly. “And my trust is still broken in places. I think maybe it will be for a while.”

Luke nods immediately. “I understand.”

“But…” My throat tightens. “Nobody will ever know me the way you do. And despite everything… I don’t want this to end.”

His eyes close briefly like the words physically hit him. Then quietly he asks, “So… no divorce?”

I laugh softly through the tears suddenly filling my eyes. “I already asked Rachel to withdraw the petition.”

Luke just stares at me. Like his brain stopped functioning completely.

“So…” He swallows hard. “We’re still married?”

I nod once. “Yes.”

The emotion that crosses his face right then almost destroys me. A mix of relief, love, disbelief, hope and so much more. Luke steps closer slowly like he’s afraid moving too fast might ruin this moment somehow. Then he brushes a piece of my hair back from my face and tucks it behind my ear, his hand still hovering there. He asks quietly, “Can I kiss my wife on her birthday?”

My breath catches instantly. After everything… That question feels monumental. Butterflies twirl in my stomach and I feel almost giddy.

“Yes,” I whisper.

Luke’s hand slides gently behind my head, before he pulls me toward him slowly, carefully, like he’s still giving me space to change my mind.

But I don’t, I want this, I want him.

The second his lips touch mine every broken piece inside me shifts painfully back into place.

Home.

That’s what this feels like. It isn’t fireworks or wild and chaotic. It’s him and me and our lifetime together.