When I stay quiet, his eyes darken. “I thought,” he hisses, “we should work on what you promised the elders.”
I look at him, forcing my face to remain straight and my body stiff. “If this is what you want, Jordan.”
“Fuck!” he snarls, smacking my head backward so it hits the floor. The pain knocks the air out of my lungs. With one hand, he grabs my throat, squeezing it while his other hand grasps a silver knife. “Beg for your life,” he hisses.
I don’t say anything, my eyes pinned to a point on the ceiling, while I can feel the tip of the knife being pressed into my left cheek. The pain is sharp, piercing, and the fact that he keeps his hand around my throat while cutting a trail with his knife down my cheek makes the pain feel even more intense.
I keep my thoughts and fears to myself, while my gaze snaps to his face. To my surprise, he looks angry at first, but then desperate. “Fuck you, Rosea, you are sick,” he spits. “You are sick in your head. Always have been. Only a psychopath wouldn’t even bat an eye now.” He looks disgusted when he looks at me. “You are such a turn-off. I can’t even look at you anymore.”
Tossing the knife to the side, he stands up and rushes out of the room, not even sparing me another glance.
Rosea,my wolf calls out, clearly on alert.Damn it! I thought he would kill us!
I finally pull myself up to my feet and walk to my restroom.I don’t think he would dirty his own hands,I reply, inspecting myself in the mirror.
He used a silver knife, that bastard. I make sure to clean the wound and disinfect it. At least it’s just a thin line, so if a scar remains, it won’t be too visible. His prints around my neck, however, are much more prominent than the last time. For how long did he strangle me? Maybe that’s the reason my wolf didn’t call out to me.
I tried to reach you,Alora says.But you were so detached; I didn’t think you were able to hear me.
What did you want me to do?I ask.
I begged you to let me out and kill him,she snarls.
Alora, I know that’s what you want—
But we can’t; that’s what you want to say, right? But how much is too much, Rosea? We can’t continue like this. He will kill us, one way or another.
I know, and I don’t want to die,I tell her.That’s exactly why I can’t let you come out to kill him. You wouldn’t be able to, as he is an alpha wolf now.I pause. The ball of dread I felt earlier turns into something closer to fury.I want to live, and I want to see him suffer. That’s my goal.
I don’t think I have much going for me anymore. I have my mate, just that he turned out to be a sociopath, and I am pretty much used goods, as he keeps telling me over and over again. Even if I manage to leave, I doubt there is much out there for me. Certainly not love or a family, both things I dreamed of when I was a teen.
The only thing I can hope for is to be able to torment Jordan in another way. Maybe it will take time for me to do it, maybe I can only do it when I am old, but one thing is for certain: I can only do it if I am alive.
Rosea,Alora says, her voice on alert.Something doesn’t feel right.
What do you mean?
I don’t know. Just stay on alert!
That’s easier said than done, but I try to focus on what’s going on around me. She is right, there are voices I can hear. It seems to be a whole group that’s talking; something happened. On a normal day, I would think of an attack, maybe, but not today.
When Jordan left me, he was furious, he was done. In a way, Alora was right when she said he looked like he wanted to kill me.
But I know him. I know he won’t dirty his hands.
These thoughts finally push me into action. He wouldn’t do it himself, but he wants to do it. He has a plan. Fuck! He has a plan. How much time has passed? A glance at my clock tells me that Jordan left two hours ago. So long! What have I been doing since? I don’t bother with covering my wound or my neck, but hurry to my stash of pills and the small bag of necessities I have hidden there. It’s for an absolute emergency. Small enough that I can hide it somewhere on my body, as I do now underneath my clothes. If Jordan sends someone to kill me, I can try to run. If he has something else planned, they’d need to strip me naked to see what I am carrying, but I hope they won’t go that far.
“Luna!” The door opens, and Clemmens comes inside. He walks slowly, almost reluctantly so, but two other warriors push forward.
Rosea,my wolf snarls.Should we put up a fight?
Not yet, spare your strength,I say.Whatever is going to happen, we’ll need it. If we make a run now—
It’s hopeless; you are right. But when someone wants to kill us—
Then, I’ll hand you full control, and you can go down the way you want to,I promise her.
I turn to look at the man, hoping my expression is void of fear and emotion. “How can I help you?”
