“Hey,” he said, training his face into that neutral expression. Phoebe rolled over the bed we’d slept in, offering the box of baked goods.
“We got stuff!” She opened it, rifling through the treats, and Dex looked to me. His eyes were full of what felt like the same fondness that was pulsing through my veins. I sent him a small smile and sat next to Phoebe. “We tried going to this Italianbakery to get your brioche, but it didn’t exist. So, we settled. Didn’t know what you’d want, so we got pretty much everything.”
“Thanks.” He plucked a flaky cinnamon roll from the box. “I appreciate the effort.”
“It was so much effort,” Phoebe said and housed a cheese Danish in two bites. Hopping to her feet, she let out a garbled “Shower” and disappeared into the bathroom.
Dex’s eyes returned to me. He hadn’t taken a bite.
“You hate cinnamon rolls, don’t you?” I said.
His mouth quirked on one side. “I’ll eat it.”
“Of course you will.” Because my sister had gotten it for him, the same way he wore the green sunglasses she got him at the gas station. He knew that when Phoebe took the time to do something for someone, it mattered.
“Everything okay?” he asked, lowering his voice even as the shower squeaked on in the bathroom.
I nodded, fingers toying with the hem of my skirt. “Yeah. I took your advice, actually, and talked to Phoebe.”
“How’d that go?”
“It wasn’t so bad.”
He dropped his gaze to the cinnamon roll in his hand. “Good. That’s good, Vi.”
“I think we’re gonna be okay,” I whispered. He met my eyes, allowing a full smile to light up his face like the sun painting the branches of trees in the woods. The corners of his eyes wrinkled with the beginnings of crow’s-feet, a slight indent dug into one cheek that couldn’t quite be considered a dimple, and his front teeth sported the teensiest space between them. I’d once thought he was intimidatingly handsome, but seeing him relaxed and maybe just a little bit happy, he was the most beautiful man in the world.
“I always knew that,” he said. I shut my eyes, the warmth of this statement swallowing me whole.
My conversation with Phoebe had opened my eyes to how withdrawn I’d become with everyone in my life, even Arden, who’d practically been fused to my side since freshman year of college. I didn’t want to be that way. I wanted to say what I meant, feel what I felt, and stop letting the fear of reaction influence my words. I couldn’t hold in the truth just because it would tug at Arden’s concern, or let Phoebe talk back because she’d hate me if I grounded her, and I wouldn’t sit here with Dex and pretend whatever happened between us didn’t impact me at all.
“You have to stop saying things that make me want to kiss you,” I said softly.
“Considering how long I’ve wanted to kiss you…” he said. “This entire time—Fuck, Vi—it’s not something I can just turn off.”
I swallowed hard. “But you said—”
“I know what I said. I meant it.”
“You sure about that?”
He let out a sound, half laugh, half pure exasperation. “Obviously not.”
I plucked the cinnamon roll out of his grasp and took a bite. He watched me, his expression full of conflict.
“I didn’t expect this to happen,” he added, lowering his voice. “Given…”
I flinched away, the unspoken end of that sentence landing heavier than the silence:Given we’re on our way to the love of my life. I wanted him in a way that physically ached, but I wouldn’t stand in the way of Dex and Catalina’s happily ever after. As long as that was what they wanted.
My brain kept reaching for assurance that this thing betweenus was real. It felt real when his eyes were on me. When I said something so ridiculous that it dragged a full-bodied laugh out of him. When he let himself flirt with me and then let it slip into the most unabashedly romantic words anyone had ever said to me. I wanted to believe in him, but how could I when we were still on our way to the woman he’d said he would love forever?
“Maybe we just… keep our distance,” I said.
He looked away. “Maybe.”
“It’s not long until Oregon. Once you see Catalina, things will be clearer, I bet.”
His eyes snapped to me. “What does she have to do with this?”
