Or would we have quietly gone on with our lives, our hearts locked away?
Even though I was upset that Omar had terminated his contract, his chance at finding true love delayed for the moment, I’m grateful, too. If he hadn’t, Salman wouldn’t have stayed and we wouldn’t have reconnected. We wouldn’t have found our easy rhythm, pulling pranks on one another again. We wouldn’t have chatted the way we used to as we set up Akash and Samira’s date.
We wouldn’t have found our way back to each other.
Salman’s hands fall to my waist, drawing me closer to him, and I am reminded of the way I straddled him on the bench yesterday. As much as I’d like to do that again, maybe Salman was right in trying to pull away earlier.
‘We should go,’ I say in between kisses.
‘But we need to make up for lost time,’ he teases, and it takes everything in me not to agree with him.
I place my hands on his chest and gently push myself away from him. His eyes are wide and unfocused and it pleases me to see that he’s unravelling just as much as I am.
Because I am. I’m sure my hair is unruly from the way his hands have been running through it and my face has flushed so much you could probably see the redness of it from space. Still, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’ve spent too much time hiding how I feel about him that it finally feels good to show him the effect he has on me.
‘I’ve missed this,’ he says, his voice thick with adoration.
‘Me too, Salman,’ I respond. If he notices the way my lips tick upward when I say his name, he doesn’t mention it. ‘But we really should be getting back to our desks.’
‘Yes, you should,’ someone says.
No, not just someone.
Ma.
‘What are you doing here?’ I ask, stepping away from Salman as if I’ve been caught doing something criminal. ‘Aren’t you supposed to be at work?’
Ma hitches her purse higher on her shoulder as her gaze bounces from me to Salman and then back to me. ‘I’m here for a meeting with Sadia. She emailed me late last night saying there was a space on her list for me.’
‘Let me leave you guys to talk,’ Salman says gently. He squeezes my hand before he steps away from me, stopping for a moment in front of Ma. ‘It’s good to see you again, Auntie.’
Ma wordlessly nods and trains her gaze on the floor as Salman steps away from us. As I wait for Ma to say something, I notice that she has dark circles underneath her eyes and her cheeks look more hollow than normal. Usually, I would jump to throw my arms around her, find ways to comfort her, but now I don’t know what to do. With everything that transpired yesterday, I’m not sure where we stand.
‘I’m glad to see you and Salman are getting along again.’
‘We’re not just getting along. We’re dating,’ I say, the word feeling strange on my tongue after all these mouths. ‘And I know you probably think this is just a phase and that we’re more likely to break up than stay together because statistically that’s what everyone says about couples before they go off to university, but I love him and it’s not going to stop me fighting for him. And I know that you don’t approve of me dating before I’m eighteen but I’m not going to wait because what’s the point? You’ll never approve of Salman anyway.’ I’m breathless by the time I stop but I take a deep breath, preparing for another round.
Only Ma doesn’t respond the way I think she will, because rather than telling me I’m being ridiculous or being angry with me for being with her former best friend’s son, she simply says, ‘I’m glad.’
‘Come again?’
‘After you left last night, I couldn’t stop thinking about how right you were. About everything.’ Ma’s voice is heavy with emotion. ‘More than anything, I’m angry at myself for havingdrawn this out when I know they were just trying to help me. It took you walking out for me to see it clearly. They were my best friends, your father’s best friends – why would they ever want to do me harm?’ Ma shakes her head. ‘I was up all night thinking about it, and seeing you with Salman just now .?.?. Though I would have liked you to date later in life, I know I can’t stop you. You will do what you want to do and you kids deserve to love without the shadow of your parents’ fight cast over you.’
I press my hands against my stomach, trying to calm the butterflies. ‘Does that mean you’ll talk to Hira Auntie and Azad Uncle?’
‘It tore me apart last night hearing that you lost a relationship because of us. So, yes, I’ll speak to Hira and we –’
I run into Ma and hug her, breaking into a sob I didn’t know had been building inside me, sputtering, ‘Thank you.’
Ma holds me in her arms, caressing my back with soft strokes. ‘Don’t thank me yet. They may have found my willingness to end our decades-long friendship unforgivable.’
‘But you’re trying,’ I mumble into her chest. Her blouse is wet with my tears.
‘Because you deserve to love wholeheartedly and without fear that you’re doing something wrong. Everyone does. Too much time has been wasted, and we need to bring our families back together. Once and for all.’ Ma kisses me on the head before lifting my chin so I can see her face.
‘You do too, you know.’ I bite the inside of my cheek. ‘The love you have for Baba isn’t going to change just because you start dating again.’
Ma nods, squeezing me even tighter. ‘I know. All your father wanted was for us to be happy.’
