I deserved that.
I moved toward the couch, keeping a careful distance between us. Drew stayed on the floor, his back against the armchair. His knuckles were still bruised from last night—purple and swollen, but I doubt he’d ever admit that they still hurt.
“Drew, I’m sorry,” I started. “I should’ve told you?—”
He cut me off, and his eyes were hard, searching. “I heard what you said on the ice and again in the locker room. But I also know you, Liam. I know how you operate. So forgive me if I’m having a hard time believing that you suddenly love her.”
The words hit harder than his fist had.
“I do love her.” My voice came out rougher than I intended, my subtle accent thickening. “I know that’s hard to believe. I know my track record is shit. But this isn’t…it’s not like before. She’s not like anyone else.”
Drew was quiet for a moment, studying me like he was trying to see through to my soul. When he spoke again, his voice had lost some of its edge. “Li, you and I have talked a lot and you always made it clear there was a reason for the way you were with women. That you thought you were too much like him and you refused to hurt someone the way he hurt your mom.”
I didn’t have to ask who he meant. He wasthe only one who knew about my deepest fears; I hadn’t even told Ava about my complicated relationship with my dad.
“Yeah.” The admission scraped its way out of my throat. “And I’m still scared about that.”
His gaze narrowed. “So you thoughtmy sisterwould be your guinea pig to see if you could handle a relationship? You thought her heart was worth risking?”
I was already shaking my head before he’d even finished his sentence. “No. It didn’t start out like that. It…” I scrubbed my hand over my face. “Look, I don’t want to go into details with you about how it started because that’s not fair to Ava. But no matter how it started, it shifted. I can’t tell you when exactly. Maybe from the beginning it was different and I was too oblivious to realize, but if you think falling in love with her was a choice I made, then you don’t know your sister. And if you thought for a second I’d risk her heart if I wasn’t sure, then you don’t know me.”
“That’s the problem, Liam. Idoknow you. I don’t think you’d do it on purpose. Despite your fears, I’ve never believed you’re like your dad. But you’ve also never put it to the test. You’ve always run before it got too hard. So how do you know you won’t hurt her? How do you know you won’t wake up one day and decide this was all a mistake?”
“I don’t.” The honesty burned, but I forced myself to hold his gaze. “I can’t promise you I won’t fuck this up, Drew. I can’t promise I’m not going to be exactly the disaster you think I am. But I can tell you that I’ve never felt this way about anyone. And the thought of walking away from her—” My chest tightened. “I can’t do it. Believe me, I would if I could because the thought of breaking her heart hurts worse than your fist to my face. But I can’t walk away from her. She’s…”
Everything.
The word sat unspoken between us.
Drew ran a hand through his hair, looking suddenly exhausted, his anger replaced with understanding. He’d had his own wakeup call with Harper. He knew what it was like when you found the woman your world revolved around, even if it was inconvenient. But then his expression shifted to concern.
“I know Ava. She acts tough, nonchalant sometimes, but she feels things deeply. If you hurt her?—”
“I know.”
“Do you? Because she’s spent her whole life feeling like she comes second. To me, to everyone. No matter how many times I’ve tried to tell her she doesn’t.”
I moved closer, needing him to hear this. “She’s not second to me. She’s never been second. She’s the only thing I see, Drew. She has been for a long time.”
He stared at me for what felt like an eternity. Then he let out a heavy breath, some of the tension draining from his shoulders.
“I’m still pissed at you.”
“I know.”
“And if you hurt her, Iwillend you. Best friend or not.”
“I’d expect nothing less.”
Another long pause. “So what now?”
“Now I go back to her apartment and tell her properly. Without the audience.”
Drew’s eyebrow lifted. “You haven’t told her you love her yet? Weren’t you with her last night?”
“Yeah, but she was…” I frowned, remembering the way she’d pulled away and gone quiet. “Off. I don’t know. She said she was tired, and genuinely seemed exhausted, so I figured I’d wait until today.”
A look flickered across Drew’s face—one Icouldn’t quite read—and he was quiet for a moment, then shook his head. “Don’t wait too long, okay? Ava’s not good at asking for what she needs. She’ll convince herself she’s fine when she’s anything but.”
