I need to get off.
Chapter 48
Another week has passed.
I haven’t made much progress with my swimming, but we’re trying. As I look in my cracked, splintered mirror, which I rarely ever do, I realize my soft curves are turning into… muscle. My shoulders especially look stronger. The change probably happened slowly, but looking at myself now, for the first time in a while, it feels rather drastic.
“I’m proud of you,” Kezra tells me as we walk up the beach after a particularly brutal swim.
I scoff at her. There’s nothing to be proud of. I’m a coward, a drunk, and a pathetic excuse of a person.
I don’t say those thoughts out loud, but she must read some of them on my face.
“Do not be so hard on yourself. Punishing oneself is a useless path that too many travel, but rarely find relief in.”
I ignore her.
“I want to ask you a question that not a single creature has had the honor of in many hundreds of years.”
I stop and face her, her tiny body hovering in front of me as her golden wings flutter gently.
“What?”
“I believe in your cause, and I believe you will find your way back to it one day soon. Let me stand beside you on that journey.”
“I’m done with all of that,” I say quietly.
“You are not. This destiny chose you. The land needs you. The fairies need you. Everyone needs you.”
“No one needs me,” I growl. I don’t mean to direct it at her. It’s at myself. “They can do it without me.”
“I know that you hate yourself right now. You’re filled with sadness and hatred that’s turned into a perfect storm that you’re not strong enough to handle. Right now. But you will overcome that which fills your soul with deep agony.”
“It doesn’t have to be me. Rhydra has the sword. Raef knows what to do. Da—” I swallow. “Daegan knows what to do. He’s free now.”
“It must be you. Maethrel spoke of it.”
“You’ve talked to Maethrel?”
“Did I talk to Maethrel, or did Maethrel talk to me?” she ponders. “Either way, that witch set me on this path which led me to you, and I shall not falter. You shall not falter.”
I shake my head, holding out my arms and then dropping them with impatience. “Okay, so what is your question?”
“Fairies can form a bond with another creature. Be it an intelligent one or a… less intelligent.” She eyes me. “You decide which one you fall under…”
“The point, Kezra?”
“There’s no point. It’s a straight, smooth line, never-ending. We will make the vow, form the sacred bond of the fairies, and together, we will be unstoppable. Breaking the curse and freeing this land at last. The land will take its first deep breath in a thousand years, and all will be right again. Over time.”
“No thank you.”
“Not even a fool has turned down a fairy bond in our history. It will give you an advantage you cannot refuse, Elysande, Princess of Ellyar.” She focuses more intently on me. “Princess of moping.”
I turn to walk away.
“What would Meela think of what’s become of you…”
I whip my head around, stomping toward her. “She would think nothing! She’s not here! She’s dead. Because of me!”
