‘Um …’ Over the sudden panicked beating of herheart, she imagined her birth family listening, waiting. ‘I suppose … well … um, Rick, please.’
After a pause, Rick’s voice sounded in her ear, tentative and cautious. ‘We … Hello, Ezzie. We were wondering if we could see you?’
Emotions flapping around like gulls on the beach, Ezz couldn’t make herself answer.
She heard him sigh. ‘We don’t want to intrude. But we’d agreed to come on a fam … on a holiday.’ He’d probably been about to say ‘family holiday’ but thought better of it. ‘We were going to Cumbria. But then we found out we could change hotels, so we came to Skye, hoping to see you. We found Rothach Hall closed, but this gentleman came out when he saw us and we asked if he’d give you a call.’
‘Right.’ Ezz’s voice squeaked in her throat. ‘Well, I’m with my …’ She found the same reluctance to say ‘family’, because Valentina and Theawereher family. But then the man on the phone was her father.
‘You’re busy,’ he guessed sadly. ‘Maybe later in the week? Julia and Iona said we should have told you we were coming, but … we didn’t want you to say no.’
Ezz imagined him standing on the drive again, in his big black coat, Kay watching on anxiously with Julia and Iona. Imagined them changing their hotel booking and undertaking a much longer journey north than to Cumbria, even knowing she might refuse to see them.
She swallowed, screwed up her eyes and, before she could change her mind, said, ‘I’ll come up and see you.’
‘That would befantastic.’ Joy rang suddenly in Rick’s voice. ‘We’ll wait here for you.’ And he rang off quickly, as if not allowing her time to change her mind.
Ezz was left gazing at Thea and Valentina, who gazedback. From their big-eyed expressions, they’d heard both sides of the conversation. ‘Wow,’ Thea whispered. ‘That’s huge.’
Valentina smiled. ‘Told you they’d be back.’
Finding herself shaking, Ezz whispered, ‘Will you come with me?’
Both sisters shook their heads. ‘Another time,’ Valentina added kindly. ‘You need to get to know them on your own first.’ She gave Ezz’s arm a squeeze. ‘But we’ll be here when you get back.’
‘Right. OK.’ Ezzie gazed at her now-silent phone. Then: ‘OK,’ again. ‘I ought to change—’
Thea rolled her eyes. ‘They’re hanging about in the freezing cold. They won’t care if you’re not wearing your best jeans.’
‘Right.’ In a dream, Ezz put on her boots, coat and hat, and picked up her car keys. Valentina and Thea gave her long, bracing hugs, then she let herself out into another raw day, with tiny snowflakes flying in the wind, and drove out of the village, turning onto Manor Road and then onto the estate, parking at the back. She floated across the courtyard and in through the back door, expecting to cross the lobby and exit again to find her visitors waiting on the drive.
But Mats intercepted her, waiting beside the lobby Christmas tree. His blue sweatshirt hugged his shoulders, and his hair shone. His eyes ate her up, though his smile held a note of apology. ‘Mum didn’t want them to freeze outside, so she brought them into the lounge. Caitriona’s made hot drinks. I’m to take you to join them.’
‘Oh.’ Ezz’s steps faltered as it flashed through her mind that Inger could sashay in and give Ezz orders while Ezz was trying to find her footing in a slippery situation.
But it was as if he could read her mind. ‘Mum’s making sure everyone else stays upstairs. I didn’t tell Astrid and Alvin you’d be here, or they’d come flying down to see you.’
Her eyes heated. She wished she could see the shining little faces and maybe have a hug, but she just nodded, and followed him through the white door she spent so much of her working day viewing from the outside, turned left down the corridor and then into the spacious lounge, where the fire crackled and the other Christmas tree shimmered with lights and tinsel.
Pausing on the threshold, she watched Rick rise slowly to his feet, followed by Kay, looking anxious, and two smiling women of Kay’s stature and curly hair. From behind her, Mats whispered, ‘I’ll be in the kitchen if you want anything.’
Ezz croaked, ‘Thanks.’ Uncertainly, she took a couple of steps further into the room.
One of the smiling women said softly, ‘I’m Julia.’ She wore jeans with boots, and a pink, fluffy jumper.
‘Iona,’ said the other, who wore leggings and a dark green ribbed tunic. Then, when no one else spoke, she sighed. ‘How come you got the gorgeous blonde hair and long legs?’
Ezz smiled at the sally, but then her lips did something wobbly and she slapped her hand over her mouth.
Rick cleared his throat. ‘Shall we sit down?’ he suggested gruffly. ‘It’s kind of your employers to invite us in like this, Ezzie.’
Silently, she nodded, floating over to an armchair and sinking into it, but then finding her voice to say, ‘Well. Hello, everyone. I can’t believe you’re here.’
‘Hamal and Vido are looking after Edina in Broadford,’ Julia supplied. ‘That’s where we’re staying.’
Finally, Ezz met Kay’s eyes, knowing they’d be anxious and beseeching as they had been before. She knew what the counsellors on the TV showMy Ghost Kingdomwould have told Ezz. Kay was the one who’d given Ezz away, causing a chasm between mother and daughter that Ezz didn’t feel able to cross.
Kay’s forehead was furrowed. On a side table stood a pretty blue mug with a gold rim, and when she picked it up and sipped from it, her hand shook. ‘It was me who wanted us all to come,’ she said after she’d put it down again, her voice thready. ‘We’ve talked and talked. Julia and Iona want to get to know you, but Rick and I feel there’s something else we need to say.’
