A sour taste comes to my mouth.
I don’t want to talk about it. But if I want any chance of keeping Angel, I have to.
“Six years ago, I met Gwen,” I start, deciding to cut straight to the meat of it. “I was still active duty, based out of Fort Liberty, in North Carolina. We met at a bar off base and started dating not long after. I didn’t do serious relationships back then, mainly because of the demands of my job. But I liked her. So I thought I’d give it a try.”
Angel nods for me to continue.
“When I was overseas, I didn’t always know when I’d be back. It was a lot to ask someone to deal with. But Gwen didn’t seem to mind. She said as long as I was fully present when I was around, that’s what she cared about.”
Angel edges a few inches closer to me. “I’m guessing there’s a but?”
I nod. “Yeah. Not at first, though. For the first six months, things were fine. I don’t know if I loved her, but I cared about her. I wanted things to work out. And then… she got pregnant.”
Angel sucks in a breath.
“We were careful,” I explain. “But things happen.”
“They do,” she agrees quietly. “What happened next?”
“I asked her to marry me. I wanted her on my insurance, to start. And I thought it would be better for the baby. More stable. Plus, like I said, I cared about her. It just seemed like the best decision.”
“Did you? Marry her?”
“I did. As soon as I could. I wanted her and the baby to be protected in case something happened to me.”
Pain stabs into my chest at the memory of the next part. “I tried my best to support her. Anything she wanted, I got it for her. A new, safer car. A better apartment. Clothes. Spa days. Holistic therapies. Trips so she could visit her friends and family. I didn’t begrudge her any of it. She was my wife. The mother of my child. Of course I’d do whatever I could for her.”
“What happened?”
“I decided to leave the Army so I could be around more for her and the baby. So I filed all the separation documents. My discharge would be right after the baby was born. I hated leaving my team, but I had to.”
Angel edges even closer to me. “I can understand that.”
“But.” My gaze dips to my lap. A weight settles heavy over my shoulders. “The baby was due in a month. I’d just gotten back from a mission, and I was going to take family leave so I could be there for the delivery. The baby—a boy, I saw the ultrasounds, heard the heartbeat, I was going to name him after my grandfather—” My voice catches.
Swallowing hard, I continue, “I came back to the apartment earlier than planned. Gwen was there with her friend. I heard them when I came inside. Talking. The friend was asking Gwen if she’d ever tell me the truth.”
“The truth?” Angel’s eyes go wide. “About?”
“The truth about the baby.” My gaze lifts to meet hers. “They were talking about how Gwen had tricked me. How the baby wasn’t actually mine.”
“What?”
“I didn’t want to believe it,” I say. “But I heard her. Gwen. Talking about how the actual father was some musician she’d met. A one-night stand, she said. Sexy as anything, but didn’t have a pot to piss in. So she thought… I’d be a good alternative.”
“Ronan.”
“I confronted her. I had to.”
Angel touches my hand. “Of course you did.”
“At first, she tried to lie about it. But when I pushed, she admitted the truth. It wasn’t my baby. She’d gotten pregnant while I was overseas, and once she realized, she thought it would be better to say it was mine.”
“Better?”
“For her. Financially. She worked in retail, so she didn’t make much money. Between the musician and me, apparently I was the more practical choice. I gave her everything. I never questioned it.”
“But.” Angel frowns. “How could she?”
