He laughs softly. “I’m not gonna fuck you until you promise. It’s important.”
I push on his chest and make him look at me. “I promise. I promise you everything. I want you in a…in such a pure, clear way. For no substantiated reason, I drove halfway across the country to find you. I could have gone anywhere, but I drove to you. I wantyou, and I wantus.”
Now, I’ve lefthimspeechless.
But only for a moment.
Sam sits up and lifts his shirt over his head.
Jesus, he is so beautiful.
“And to clarify,” he says, “I’m notfuckingyou tonight. I’mmaking loveto you.”
He tosses his keys from his pocket and undoes his belt, and I nearly come apart.
Then, he gives me a mischievous smile and asks, “You ready? Because this will probably take a while.”
Oh God, I am totally ready.
He eases off my shirt and ever so slowly slides my pants down. Then, he runs the outline of my bra with one finger. I put my hands on his arms while he takes his time kissing me and teasing my skin with his tongue. By the way he touches the fabric of what little I have on, Sam—I can tell—is a guy who appreciates lingerie.
After he’s had his fill, he finally pulls down my straps and undoes the hook in the back, and I finish taking it off. His touch on my breasts is both gentle and confident, and I love watching him move over me. I also love how my body shivers when he takes my nipple between his fingers with just the right pressure, and then he grazes his mouth over it.
It’s as if I’ve never had sex before, which certainly isn’t true. But I’ve never had sex with Sam Bishop, and this is clearly an entirely new game.
He teases and delivers with every move, and it’s fucking hot. I find that I’m almost intoxicated by how he touches me. His care is unparalleled. I put a hand over his, feeling each movement and pattern, trying to comprehend this mix of tenderness and raw sensuality.
A deep rumble of thunder rolls outside through the cove, and rain starts to patter against the deck. The last time we kissed when there was thunder, we stopped. This time, we won’t.
Every move Sam makes is slow and deliberate, and I know it’s going to be a while until he’s inside me. But I can wait because the way he touches me is exquisite, and I could stay like this forever.
I close my eyes and feel his mouth continuing to explore, and he is thorough and perfect when kissing my neck, my shoulders, down my arms, over to my stomach. I curl my hips up, wanting more, wanting him to move his mouth lower. I crave what I’ve never had before, what Jay never did for me.
With Jay, sex was about control and power and getting what pleasedhim. He had no interest in my pleasure. It was why I tuned out and faded away when we were together. Or maybe I sought out someone like him to punish myself for all my inadequacies. But I should have been stronger. I should have stopped him and protected myself—as I should have done against my mother’s words and actions.
You are useless.
Such an unpleasant person to be around.
The way you forget and mix things up? I don’t know what in heaven’s name is wrong with you. It’s a good thing you have me.
“You still with me?” Sam asks.
I nod.
He is lying beside me, propped up on an arm, his free hand caressing my shape. “Open your eyes.”
I do what he asks.
“Look at me,” he says, placing a hand on my face and turning me to him. “You with me for real?”
I find deep familiarity and comfort when I meet his eyes. It’s like coming home to a place I never knew I had. This is where I’m supposed to be—with him.
I smile now. “Yes. If I watch you, yes.”
“Then, keep watching.”
After his fingers have moved over my waist and legs, he runs the back of his hand between my thighs but only for a second, only enough to make me miss it terribly when he moves back to my breasts. I touch two fingers to my lips and then to his, passing him a kiss so that I don’t have to take my eyes off him. Just as he kisses my fingers, his hand glides smoothly beneath my underwear. Now, he smiles when I gasp under his touch. He starts very slowly, moving lightly, taking his time with working up my arousal, until I am breathing hard and digging into his shoulders.
