Sam pulls my underwear fully off and strokes my inner thigh. I’m so wet now that I think I might finally go legitimately crazy if he stops, but I can tell by the look in his eyes that he isn’t going to stop.
“Stay with me,” he purrs, easing two fingers inside me.
My back arches, and my vision gets blurry, but I stay with him. His pace as he begins to slide in and out is steady, letting me get used to the care in his touch. I reach up and rest my hand on his face, keeping my eyes locked on his. Even when he curls his fingers a bit and hits a spot that makes me nearly go blind and even when he starts to move a little faster, we maintain eye contact.
“You are so beautiful,” he murmurs. “You are so beautiful, Stell.” He tilts his head up. “Look in the mirror.”
My head falls to the side, and our lovemaking reflects back from the old mirror that Sam polished and hung in my bedroom. I study myself, the way my body intuitively responds against his hand. I watch him move his arm under my neck as he cradles me and keeps moving his hand.
The storm is on us now, and lightning flashes into the room through the French doors. Thunder growls, and driving rain hits the window.
“Watch yourself come,” he breathes into my ear. “Watch how gorgeous you are, how safe you are, how free you are.”
And so, I do. Even when it gets nearly impossible to focus because my body tightens and shudders over and over, I watch myself. Then, I meet Sam’s eyes in the mirror. It’s so clear in his expression that he’s giving me this to show how much he feels, not for any other reason. It’s not because he wants something physical in return or because he’s taking advantage of me. This is new, but after tonight, I couldn’t ever accept less.
Eventually, my body begins to calm after the heightened waves of my orgasm. Now, I turn back into him, and he lowers his mouth to mine, kissing me deeply. I reach between us to finally unzip his jeans.
“We can still stop. You know that, right?”
“You’re insane if you think I don’t want you inside me.”
I tug on his jeans and boxers, and he helps me get them off. With my hands on his sides, I pull him to roll on top of me.
“One sec. I have to do something first.” Sam rubs his nose against mine, and his eyes sparkle.
So, it’s only for a moment that his cock brushes between my legs before he is kissing his way down my body until his mouth is on me. Maybe Sam is trying to prove all the ways that he can make me come, but I’m not complaining because his mouth feels incredible. I’m fighting so hard for my sanity, and now, I’m on the brink of losing it again because his tongue is the most perfect thing in the world. It wouldn’t be a bad way to go.
I am still breathing hard and shaking when he crawls back up. I wouldn’t protest if he had a list of other things to do, but I’m really beyond ready for him now.
He laughs when I throw an arm off the bed to yank open the nightstand drawer, revealing three boxes of different condoms.
“Well, I see you’re prepared.”
“I was going with a build-it-and-they-will-come philosophy, and one of us already has. Twice.”
“Very punny.” He reaches for a box and shakes out condoms before tearing one off with a hand.
“Oh, one-handed, huh? Show-off,” I tease.
His smile is ridiculously cute. “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m quite good with one hand.”
“Oh, I noticed,” I assure him.
Together, we lift up until he is kneeling in front of me, and I’m sitting. I set one hand on his chest and touch my other to his cock, wrapping my hand around him. It’s my impulse to lean in, but I don’t. The truth of how much I hated it when Jay made me go down on him, how sick he and I both were, hits me. I’m not ready to do this even though I know how different tonight is with Sam, but he doesn’t seem to mind. In fact, he doesn’t seem to expect it.
I do, however, feel more than comfortable using my hands on him, learning how he feels. He doesn’t press against me or push on the back of my head to try for more. He simply lets me touch him at my own pace, which seems to work given the sounds he is making.
When he starts to get a little breathless, he rips open the condom and puts it on. For a moment, I lean in and kiss his stomach and his defined abs as he rubs his hands over my shoulders and through my hair. I am so…joyful…for what we’re about to do, for the closeness we’re going to have. It’s something I never imagined I could experience.
I look up to Sam as I lie back, and he lowers himself. He wraps our hands together and kisses me. Then, I feel just the tip of him against me as he lifts to look me in the eyes, and the head of his cock slides inside me. And he stays there, making sure I’m okay. Neither of us moves for a minute. Slowly, he slides in just a bit more and then pulls out. Then, in again, pushing deeper, and he stays there. He slips a hand under my lower back and keeps it against me, holding us still.
The rain is torrential now—the thunder and lightning and wind all loud, I’m sure—but the only thing that I hear clearly is Sam.
“Stay with me,” he says, pushing fully inside me.
He couldn’t lose me now if he tried.
