However, today was Mary’s appointment for the results of her PET scan.I need to visit her, and I’m scared to admit that I’m dragging my feet because I don’t want to run into Copeland.Even after all these years, my heart still beats wildly when in his presence.
So, what’s a coward to do?I call instead.Dialing her number, I place the phone to my ear.It rings three times before she answers.“Hello, my dear Ellie,” she greets me.
“Mary, how are you?”I ask.
“Oh, I’m just fine.”
“Do you need anything?Anything at all?”
“Actually, you know, a slice of Alice’s apple pie sounds divine.She mentioned she was making a few today.You wouldn’t happen to have a piece left over, would you?”she asks.
“I’m sure we do.Alice always bakes several.Is now a good time to bring it over?”If I run into Copeland, so be it.Mary never asks for anything, so this is a concession I’m just going to have to make.
“Ellison Moran, you know my door is always open to you and your sisters and your grandparents, anytime, day or night.”
“Gram and Gramps are in Alabama.Gulf Shores,” I tell her.“They’re living their best retired life.”I laugh.
“Good for them.At their age, still getting around the way that they do, they need to be living each moment as if it might be their last,” she says, her voice hitching just slightly.
“I agree.I told them to go, but stay in touch.”
“Let me guess?Ruby told you to stop hovering.”
“You know her well.”I laugh.“Let me get that pie together, and I’ll be right over.How many pieces do we need?”
“It’s just me, dear,” she says, and I can hear her smile.I’m busted, asking if I need to bring a slice for Copeland, Chandler, Macie, or the kids.I would have brought them all a slice, but she knew I was fishing to see if Copeland was there.
“Okay.One slice of Alice’s apple pie, coming right up.”
“Thank you, Ellie.I’ll see you soon,” she says, ending the call.
It’s just after five, and I was hoping Copeland and Chandler were no longer there.It seems like holding out helped.
Quickly, I close down my computer, grab my phone, keys, and purse, and head to the kitchen to get Mary her slice of Alice’s apple pie.Tonight’s dinner is chicken pot pie, so I scoop her up a helping of that, as well.If she’s already eaten, she can warm it tomorrow so she doesn’t have to cook.
Instead of leaving through the dining room, just in case Copeland is there having dinner, I slip out the back door and walk around to the other side of the building, where the employees park.I drove today, knowing that I’d be going to visit Mary at some point.Sure, I could have walked to her place, but I have a better chance of not being detected if I drive.
Hiding from Copeland is becoming a full-time job.I’m constantly thinking about how to change my routines so I can evade him.It’s pathetic, really.He’s a man who once held my heart—still does.The past is the past, even though there has been no one else for me but him.I should be able to be in the same room with him.
We were kids.It’s been nearly two decades, but there’s nothing about how I feel about him, now or then, that feels like we were just kids.Copeland James was my everything.I’ve accepted that a huge piece of my heart will always be his.I was okay with that, but now that he’s back in town, it’s harder to ignore.
When I pull into Mary’s driveway, she’s sitting on the front porch swing.She waves as I climb out of the car, before reaching into the back seat to grab her treats.
“That looks like a lot of pie,” she teases as I make my way up the steps.
“Well, tonight’s special was chicken pot pie.I wasn’t sure if you’d eaten, but if so, it’s just as good heated up,” I tell her.
“That sounds wonderful.We had a late lunch, but that will hit the spot in a little while.Thank you, Ellie.”She smiles at me as she pats the open seat on the porch swing next to her.“Sit with me.”
Nodding, I place the goodies I brought her on the small table next to what looks like a half-empty glass of lemonade and take a seat as she instructed.
“It’s in my lymph nodes,” she says, not beating around the bush.“The doctors are hopeful that they can get it all.We caught it early, but sitting here, I’ve decided that I’m going to have the mastectomy.They said we could try treatment without it, but I’m geared up for a fight.I will not let this disease win…” she says, her voice trailing off.
“Oh, Mary.”I reach over to take her hand in mine.Tears prick my eyes, but this strong woman sitting next to me gives me a soft smile, her eyes dry.“I need to see both of my boys happy and settled.I miss Heath every single day, but I’m not ready to join him yet.There is still just so much—” she says, and this time her voice wavers.
“What can I do?”I feel helpless.
“Honestly, I don’t know.I need to tell the boys my decision, and I’ll call the doctor to let them know.I already told them to fight aggressively.Based on what they’ve already told me, we’ll have to schedule surgery for the lymph node removal under my arm and the mastectomy, and then chemo will follow.We’ll do another scan and see if radiation is necessary.With the mastectomy, that might not be needed.”
