I groaned and did what she said. There was no use in arguing with my mother. But truth be told, seeing that gap close did make me feel better.
“Now, get online and order yourself a brand-new vibrator—”
“Mom!”
“No, Keeley, you listen to me. He may have been good in bed—” she said, then muttered, “hopefully he had at least one redeeming feature,” under her breath.
He was… meh, okay I supposed.
“—but now you’re doing this for you, and being satisfied is a surefire way to stop yourself from jumping back in bed with that loser dickhead. Trust me, get a gorgeous big one. Just make sure it’s one of the good ones. Ideally it should have a cord. That way you’ll never run out of batteries at the wrong time.”
“Oh, heck, Mom. I really don’t want to be talking with you about this.”
“Oh hush, I’m imparting my wisdom. You’ll thank me one day.”
“Or die of embarrassment.”
“Eh, you’re strong enough to handle a little embarrassment, Keeley, especially when you get good orgasms out of it. You get it from me.”
I huffed out a mortified laugh, and she continued. “One day, you’ll wake up and you’ll be thankful Simon fucked up so badly. You’ll be happy and having great orgasms.”
I needed to get off this topic and pronto. “Have you dated since Dad? I mean, I know you wouldn’t have introduced them to me unless it was serious.”
“Who needs a date to have orgasms?” Mom laughed, and I groaned. She took pity on me when she finally dropped it and answered my question with another of her own. “Do you remember Dakota?”
“Yeah, the lady with the waist-length braids.”
“We were friends with benefits for two years.”
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. She’d shocked me silent. I had no idea.
“Huh,” I said after longer than was proper. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”
“She wanted to get more serious than I did.” I could imagine her shrugging as she said that. “Since then, I’ve just been happy to hook up. I have a few friends with benefits and a couple of situationships, but nothing serious. I like my freedom too much. Your dad didn’t ruin me for relationships, but he did teach me that I didn’t want to be in one. You’ve now got that chance too.”
“Yeah, I won’t be trusting anyone else in a hurry.”
“That’s what the vibrator is for,” she deadpanned.
“Oh my God, Mom.” I laughed.
“In all seriousness, Keeley, it’s okay to grieve the future you thought you’d have together.”
I swallowed and nodded even though she couldn’t see me.
“It’s also okay to grieve the relationship you thought you had. But remember, he wasn’t the person he claimed to be—that isn’t your fault. He’s the liar. But don’t pine for him. You deserve so much better than that piece of shit. Are you sure you don’t have a shovel?”
I laughed again. “No need, Mom. Thank you.”
“I’ll come over tomorrow and help you with the baby.”
“I’d like that.”
I hung up and blew out a breath. Mom was a handful. She was a gossip queen, blunt beyond belief, fiercely loyal, always joking—the complete opposite to the serious, repressed man I remember my father being—and could always make me feel better. She was right. I wouldn’t cry for him again. But my tears would flow for what had been stolen from me—a happy family and a home filled with laughter and love.
I inhaled slowly and wiped my wet cheeks.
No.
