Tired of the mental acrobatics I was giving myself, I stood and went to shower. Unlike the last time I’d taken him, I didn’t necessarily feeldirty. Regret was harder to find and cling to as I stood in the shower and let the hot water massage me.
But there wasn’t a chance in hell that I could view what happened last night as a step forward to answers. No clarity was provided.
He’d shown up. I’d directly asked him what he wanted. When I worried that question was still too vague, I asked what he wanted fromme.
I thought he’d muttered something, but it was too quiet for me to understand. The next second? He was on me, blowing my mind and making me rabid for him to fill me with his erection that prodded at my stomach.
Of course, he didn’t answer me.
He is the boss. He holds the power.
And I had to come to terms with the fact that I would never have the bond of love or earnest affection over him.
By the time I prepared myself to face him, dressed in what I considered a simple, professional-chic outfit, I felt slightly calmer. Not relaxed or confident, but saner to be near him for another workday.
Because now I knew what to expect.
He’d be indifferent, like last time.
He’d be cool and aloof, like last time.
If he couldn’t want to linger and stay with me after we’d had sex again, there was no room to hope that he’d want to be with me in any other fashion.
Hot. Then cold.
Close. Then distant.
It was a pattern I didn’t care for, but with the reminder that I wasn’t here to determine how things could be between us, it seemed wiser to fall into line and accept his expectations.
When I left the house, I paused at the front door.
I hoped this wouldn’t be a habit, this hesitation to fully step out with the worry that another intruder could be watching me and waiting to get to me.
No one came close, though. Within my line of sight, pairs of guards patrolled along the property.
See?
Everything is as it should be.
I drew in a deep breath and resumed walking over the threshold where Adrik had shown up last night so unexpectedly but clearly with one thing on his mind. Thinking back to that rabid need in his eyes distracted me from glancing at where the blood stains were.
And as I allowed myself the guilty pleasure of thinking back to how much he’d worshiped my body, I gave in to a little pride. A bit of glee.
He could have any woman in the world, but he had wantedme.
He could’ve been anywhere else on Earth these past few days to be with any other woman, but he’d come back here and had wantedme?—
Oh.
I frowned as I walked over. The sun wasn’t up so high that it was unbearably hot, but my cheeks turned warm anyway.
With embarrassment again.
And a side of worry.
He didn’t use a condom last night either.
I didn’t even think of it.
