Arial and I freeze. Larry’s head whips back and he stares at the bedroom.
“What was that?” Arial asks.
“What was what?” Playing dumb is my only hope. Larry trots over to the bedroom and scratches at the door.
“That sounded like a man yawning. In your bedroom.”
“Oh? That?” Think. Think. Think. “Uh… probably my neighbor. My walls are like…paperthin.”
“Really?” The skepticism in Arial’s voice could fill a Russian novel.
I try to push the door closed, but Arial is not moving her foot. Her brown boot stays wedged in there like a designer bootie of doom.
“Sorry, but I’ve got to go. I’m going to be sick!” I hear my bedroom door creak open, and pure adrenaline rushes into my veins. “You have to go! Sorry!” I push Arial back a step and she wobbles back over my threshold, shocked.
“Whoa?” she cries, arms pinwheeling as I slam the door shut and throw myself against it, just as my bedroom door swings open. Jack comes wandering into my kitchen, clad only in his boxer briefs, dark hair tousled, sexy beardstache rumpled, and looking like the sex god he is. I’m panting, back against my front door, and I put a finger to my lips, gesturing for him to be quiet.
“Um, Sora?” I hear Arial’s voice outside. “That was… uh, weird? But hope you feel better soon. I’ll send you info on the talk show? Okay? We can coordinate your outfit?”
“Sorry! My stomach!” I cry, hoping that excuse is good enough for strong-arming my boss.
“Oh, uh? Feel better?” Then I hear Arial’s footsteps retreat down my stairs. Thank God.
I glance at the gorgeous and mostly naked Jack Mann.
That was close. Too damn close.
“Uh… good morning?” he offers tentatively. “Is everything okay?”
Thirteen
SORA
The problem with sleeping with someone is that it clouds our judgment. According to actual science, the lateral orbitofrontal cortex is less active during sex. That’s the part of our minds responsible for reason, decision-making, and value judgments. In other words, our brain.
—SOLO FEBRUARY CHALLENGE
Everything is not okay. I have no idea what I’m going to do. I’ve just had the best sex of my life, during a month when I’m supposed to haveno sex whatsoever.Because… the universe hates me. Because this is rotten timing. Because how can I keep having sex with Jack Mann and give Arial the articles she wants, not to mention keep on feeding the fans? Who are, by the way, filling up every available DM with their need for more and more and more.
My ex is pressuring me to get with her. Can I take one night off? What are the rules of #SoloFeb?asks one.
My mom just tried to set me up on a blind date, but he’s kind of cute. Can I really ask him to wait until March? Is that reasonable?asks another.
My best friend says casual sex is okay during #GoSolo because it’s about avoiding deep emotional commitments. True or false?asks a third.
Can you #GoSolo if you’re married?This reader got an equal amount of blasting and support, with people divided into two camps. So, now, it was up to me to issue an official ruling from on high.
It’s almost too much. People are really trying to navigate #GoSolo, and they’re treating me like the ultimate referee. I guess I did come up with it, but am I the Supreme Court on dating now? Seriously?Me?
This is all wrong.
Not to mention, with my own #GoSolo slipup, I’m increasingly feeling like a fraud, weighing in on arguments online, telling people they must stay strong when I didn’t.
Still, I’ve got just a little less than two weeks left until the end of February, I remind myself. I can just suck it up. Can’t I?
I say goodbye to Jack Mann, even as I worry someone might see him leave my apartment. But who? Arial? I made sure to watch her walk down the street all the way to the L stop. I don’t need her circling back and catching Jack Mann in his morning walk of shame. Pam might rat on me, too. That would be terrible. I remember her side-eying Jack in the hallway, and wonder if she’s planning to blow my cover.
I’m racked with guilt, and yet, I don’t really regret anything, because… I just had the best sex of my life. Maybe there’s some way to still go solo but not be Mann-free?
