How was that fair?
When you have a chance to kill a man who deserves it, do it.
That would be my new creed. I’d had a chance in December. I pressed my father’s knife to Gladstone’s throat like he was a fish to fillet, but Tramel, dear Tramel, had taken the weapon from me. He started to kill him and began slicing the fiend’s neck wide open, but I asked him to stop.
Why did I prevent justice? Silently sobbing I heard the breeze return the sound of my shallow breaths. My heart thumped like it would crawl free from my ribs.
A jaguarete could be in the tall grass looking at my sister and me and the baby the way I viewed Stilton cheese.
We were prey, probably smelled like it too, with all the bloodshed from the birth and the battle to escape the Elizabeth Ann Plantation.
The Gladstones owned part of that foul place.
The smugglers made it seem as if Helena’s escape was a part of a rebellion. The enslaved rose up. Many were freed but more died.
“Chari, don’t fidget.” Helena’s whisper sounded weaker.
Teasing her like I always did might help rally her strength. “You sound like Mama. Next, you’ll tell me to walk across the dray with a book on my head.”
The rumble in my sister chest wasn’t laughter. It was that heavy, throaty cough of the birthing fever. It wouldn’t break and she’d grown more tired.Keep breathing, sweet girl.That’s what I wanted to shout.
Those words would only leave me in prayer.
“Tell me about London, Chari. What’s it like, the world across the sea?”
“Large, Helena. With big buildings. And the fashions are amazing. I’ll take you shopping in warehouses with silks.”
She wheezed. “Tell me of your art. Your Gantry let you keep painting?”
“Yes, I paint. Lord Tramel, he arranged for me to meet people at the theatre. I may paint for them if I choose.”
“They let a woman do that?”
“My father-in-law sent word on my behalf, along with one of my paintings. That convinced them.”
“That’s nice, Chari. Do they call you that? Probably not. Lady Cecilia.”
“No, they call me Lady Gantry. There are so many rules of address.”
“Our big sis hated rules. I hope to see her soon. Mama and Papa too.”
That sentiment chilled. I can’t lose my last sister. Please let the fever break.
I grasped Helena’s hand and pumped her fingers. “No, don’t you give up. I came for you as soon as I could. My father-in-law forced your lover to confess.”
“Husband. I married Jeremiah. He has my papers. But, Chari. You talk more of Tramel than Gantry. Is your husband dead?”
“No. He was quite fine, last I saw him.”
She bit her lip and winced. “Chari, you married on a whim to a man you’d never seen before. Did you never learn to love him?”
That was a sticky question. “I loved him when he kissed me. He was mysterious and exciting. Then he promised me adventure.”
“That’s nice. True love—”
“It’s not. I think I know how love dies. When the wanting and joy go away, apathy fills the empty places.”
She pulled our hands to her stomach. “And now you love this Tramel.”
