Swinging his whip, he kept me close. We went up the stairs and barreled into Blaren House. He rested on the other side of the door as a servant took his coat and hat.
I kept my wrap. I wasn’t sure I wanted to stay or if Wycliff wanted me here. Too much was happening.
“There are bedrooms upstairs. Go make yourself comfortable. You’re safe here.”
He left me standing in the wide hall.
I didn’t want to be sent away, so I followed him to his study.
Sitting on the edge of his desk, he put his sjambok down. “You should be resting. There’s a modest staff of loyal individuals here to assist you.”
“We need to determine what we are to do.”
“About what, Ruth? Staying alive through the night? Please go rest.”
I felt as if I was losing something, and I didn’t know why. I came closer. I had to see his face. “You don’t love me because of what Madame said?”
He stood up and came to me and placed a palm under my chin. “I’m in love with you as much as ever, but I need a partner. I want to be a father to my son. I don’t know how our marriage can work.”
“You burned the proof.”
“It was half a marriage certificate, like half a marriage, where there’s not enough trust. Nothing more links you to Chatsworth Adoniram Wilkinson. You’re still the widow of the mythical and flawed Adam Wilky. And I’m Christopher’s big cousin. I still get to have a piece of him.”
Wycliff giving up? No. To hold on to him, I put my hands on his wrists. “What are you saying?”
“That this is all my fault. My mistakes made you vulnerable, made us take unnecessary risks. I must’ve made you believe you had to. You don’t know me. But that’s my fault, too. I’ve given you Adam and now Wycliff. None of them are for you.”
“Don’t discount my need for the truth because you think me fragile. I am fragile, but I’m strong, too. I had to hear the truth. You had to hear it from Talease.”
He put his fingers to my temples. Then traced lines to my mouth. “The truth was in here. Just say it aloud. I would’ve believed you, instantly. And why should I not? You’re a truthsayer. I trust the truth in you.”
“Then why are you pushing me away?”
“Ruth, I’m not a truthsayer, not like you. I’m a protector. I’ll do what I must to save you and to avenge threats to my interests.” He moved back to his desk. “You’re my guest in Blaren House. Let me have you escorted upstairs. The best room in the house is yours.”
“Wycliff, no. We should—”
“Let’s survive the night.
He clapped his hands and ordered Lawden to bring me upstairs.
My truth didn’t break my Wycliff.I’dbroken him, and I didn’t know how to fix him.
I let him push me away.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Candlelight
It would be easier to find Nickie and beat him to death with the sjambok. It would be wonderful and liberating for a moment, but Wycliff would never survive the inquest. Everything would point back to him. A barrister like Mr. Marks would make sure of a conviction.
No. The way to get Nickie was the same way all Wycliff’s enemies had been conquered, the financial transactions.
He stretched in his father’s chair and pored through the second ledger. The rhyme or rhythm of the accounts made no sense. This ledger made it appear as if Wycliff’s father had authorized Johnson’s illicit transfers. Algernon Nathaniel Wilkinson, ANW, was initialed page after page.
He drummed the desk, tapped the imitation bride sculpture. Wycliff hated the piece again. The romantic tale of men claiming their women was rubbish, horse leavings. Women shouldn’t be forced to do anything, not to become a bride, or a lover, or anything.
They shouldn’t have the truth hidden, either, even if it was for the best.
