Chapter 53
The Final Truth.
Joi paused a long time on the other end of the cell. Her heart probably raced, trying to figure out what to tell me next. She could curse me or pretend she has no idea what I'm talking about. Again, my gut said she probably wanted to remain loyal to Carter and not hurt him. Joi didn't seem the type to tell the wife about the affair she had with that woman's husband.
“Carter doesn’t know I’m calling you, and I won't tell him we spoke unless he asks.”
She replied quietly and without rancor, “Maybe you should talk to him.”
I turned around and leaned against my bathroom counter. “No, I’m talking to you, woman to woman. The fact that you’re not denying anything speaks volumes. Are you still sexing my husband?”
“It’s over between us.” She finally breathed.
I nodded. “I know. It ended back in August. Lasted maybe three months.”
“If you know, then why are you calling me?”
“He never told me. Probably never planned to. I had a hunch and wanted to see if it was correct. I didn't understand how he kept a secret for so long, and then I remembered that he only moved this past summer differently. He’s a creature of habit. He managed to keep the fact that he had a son with you and Chelsea for five years. It didn’t interrupt our lives here becausehe believed it was his obligation to be there for Sekani. He didn't make any extra trips beyond what his football schedule allowed. Love made him move differently. You made him move differently. You must have traveled here alone to see him or met up with him when you were together.”
She admitted, “At first, we never met up alone or without Chelsea. The three of us always spent time with Carter until this past summer. I already travel with my company for work, so flying to L.A. to see him was easy. Chelsea doesn't know.”
“Maybe she does, or maybe she doesn’t. I don’t plan to tell her. We’re not friends anymore, and I have no loyalty to her.” I crossed my ankles, wondering why I felt so numb and detached as I spoke to the woman who stole his heart. At least temporarily.
In everything we discussed at the hotel, he and Chelsea made it plain that it wasn’t about sex and that they hadn’t had sex since college. But my husband craved sex. Partly because he was a Scorpio and partly because he was an athlete with energy to expend. If he wasn’t getting it from me, he was getting it elsewhere. And for weeks, he didn’t seem to care about me or want to have sex with me. Lipstick stains and different soap. Irritable when confronted about his behavior. More importantly, when Joi walked into the hotel room, Carter tensed, and Joi wouldn’t look at him. When I asked who slept with him, she quickly gathered her son and moved to another room, leaving a vaguely familiar scent. He only spoke about Chelsea to me and never Joi since the hotel showdown, as if Chelsea was Sekani's only parent.
Carter didn’t tell me about Joi because he didn’t want to be a liar, and a part of him wanted to leave the door open in case he decided to be with Joi again. Being with Grey today reminded me of how love can make you forget everything and everybody. Love can make you careless and selfish. I barely picked up mychildren on time because I didn't want to leave Grey. I was a little snappy with the children because I wanted to be back in his bed with him. Carter had been the same way during the summer. He'd been that way because he'd fallen in love.
“Do you love him?” I asked, though I knew the answer. It was hard not to love a man like Carter. He was a man's man who knew how to take care of a woman. Add that he was handsome and rich, and it was damn near impossible not to stalk him.
“It doesn’t matter. He’s never leaving you. If that's what you're wondering." Her voice dripped with firmness and sadness.
“I didn’t ask about him or me. I asked if you loved him,” I repeated.
Her strong voice wavered. “I... I didn’t mean to fall in love. Didn’t even know I could ever be attracted to a man again. Sekani had a crisis, and Carter was already in Dallas and flew to Houston within a couple of hours. Chelsea has a hard time accepting his disease and disappears when he’s in the hospital. I never know if she’s disappearing into other people or just disappearing,” she said somewhat bitterly. “That night, she left. I was alone and crying when he arrived because Sekani had a fitful rest. He stayed by my side, joking and teasing me to keep me positive and believe that Sekani would be well again soon. We were both tired, and he told me to sleep in the extra bed in the room, and that he would take the chair. The chair was too small for him, and he was dead on his feet. Told him to join me and...” Her voice trailed off. “It ended almost as quickly as it started because he decided that his marriage and the twins came first.”
“Did he say ‘Darren’ or his marriage?” I closed my eyes, unsure if I hoped he said my name or not.
“Marriage. That’s probably why I loved Carter so easily. He’d been dedicated to you and his children. Told me he'd never stepped out on you, and whether it was a line or not, I believedhim.” Joi then apologized, “I’m sorry. I never saw myself as a cheater, and I hate that I compromised my values. Once I met you, I could see why he didn’t want to leave you. He never spoke ill of you and hasn’t tried anything or called me since he told me it was over in August. If that means anything to you.”
Getting everything I needed from her, I pushed away from the counter. “Um...don’t tell Carter that we spoke.”
“Okay." She agreed without hesitation. "He keeps his distance. We don't talk anymore anyway. Everything regarding Sekani goes through Chelsea.”
“I’m going to go now. I’m not mad at you or him. At least not anymore. If he were ever to cheat on me, at least you weren’t a skank or a groupie. I do hope you find happiness, and Chelsea may not be it. She’s selfish, and I don’t think she can help it or will change.”
She chuckled wryly. “Beginning to see that. From your vibe, you and I probably could’ve been friends in another life and time.”
I did like her. I sensed what my husband saw. A genuine, beautiful woman inside and out. “Yeah. In another life and time. Take care.”
I hung up the phone and cried while in the shower. Allowing my tears to cleanse my soul of all residual anger, doubt, and hurt that I had toward Carter. Ironically, talking to Joi, I trusted him again. I knew I could look at him for him and accept him and his flaws.
"MAMA, COACH GREY SAIDhe'll start training me for the youth league. He said I'm ready to begin racing." Elle jumped around me as I chopped veggies for the salad.
Ethyn, who'd been stirring the tomato sauce for spaghetti at the stove, looked back. "When can I go to practice with Elle again? I might want to race, too. Coach Grey is way cool." Lately, he'd been less involved in his electronics and expressed interest in sports, much to Carter's delight.
"Yeah, Mama. I asked Coach, and he said it was fine as long as you and Daddy said it was okay." She implored, "Can he please train with me?"
Today, when I'd dropped off Elle, Ethyn had been with me since his music lessons had been canceled. He'd been impressed with being on the UCLA campus and the stadium. He watched Elle run with the college students and Grey's one-on-one time with her.
