Or is it possible the man I’m destined to be with has been in front of me almost my entire life?
I blindly reach for my phone on the nightstand, hoping it’s late enough that Chelsi won’t murder me for calling her at this hour because this is the definition of an emergency.
Shit. It’s barely 6 a.m. on a Sunday.
Screw it. I’m calling. Might as well FaceTime if I’m already going to piss her off.
“What?” Chelsi grumbles. The lights are off, so it’s impossible to see her face, location, and whether she’s alone. “Is something wrong? Are you hurt?” she asks, panic lacing her tone.
“I’m okay.”
“Huh? Then why the fuck are you calling me at 6 a.m.? The only reasons you’re allowed to call this early are if you need to be bailed out of jail, were in an accident, or need help burying a body. Everything else can wait until after 10 a.m. Call me then, Kate. Goodbye?—"
“Chelsi, wait! Jake kissed me last night,” I blurt out.
Chelsi turns on her bedside lamp and sits against her headboard, her mouth agape. “Come again? Did I hear you correctly?” She rubs her eyes and yawns. “Jake kissed you. Your Jake.”
“He’s notmyJake.”
Chelsi chuckles. “Uh-huh. He’s definitelyyourJake. I thought that before finding out he kissed you. Now, spill the beans. How did this happen? Is he a good kisser? Did you like it?”
“It was hands-down the best kiss of my life. Can’t stop thinking about it.” I blush, reliving his lips against mine, his hands on my body, and the taste of his mouth. I spend the next twenty minutes going intoexcruciatingdetail about what happened, how it made me feel, what he said, and where thingsstand. Chelsi asks countless questions about his body language and tone of voice, hoping to glean more information about his state of mind I might have overlooked. Her face remains neutral throughout, refusing to give me any clue as to her thoughts until I’m finally done.
“What type of advice do you want this morning?” she asks, cocking her head and staring at me intently. “Brutally honest? Supportive cheerleader? Or did you just need to tell someone what happened and don’t require any advice?”
I wince. Should’ve seen this coming. I rest my head against the headboard and look at the ceiling for a minute. “Brutally honest.” My jaw tightens as I ready myself for the onslaught of an unbridled Chelsi, considering I gave her free rein to say whatever the fuck she’s thinking.
“Good choice. Prepare yourself because I have a lot of thoughts,” she replies, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “From everything you’ve told me about Jake, he seems like a great guy. Minus the shitty disappearing act he pulled years ago, but the two of you seem to be past that nonsense.”
I nod, pulling my knees to my chest and balancing the phone on one of them.
“Plus, he’s fucking hot. Like, if he wasn’t your second-best friend, I would’ve jumped into his bed the first day I met him. Actually, that was his mother’s funeral, so it would have been really odd. Unless it was grief sex, which I’ve heard?—”
“Focus, Chelsi,” I plead.
“Bottom line: He’s crazy about you. I knew that before you called me this morning. It was obvious at your engagement party.”
“What are you talking about?” My entire face scrunches as I try to process what she said. Nothing happened at the party.
“The way he looked at you. How his pulse seemed to increase when you were near. The number of times he glanced at yourlips,” Chelsi says, counting them off on her fingers like it’s a never-ending list and she doesn’t want to forget one. “How his eyes lit up whenever he’d talk to you or about you to someone. The pride in his voice as he touted your accomplishments. And we can’t forget the insane level of effort and personalization he put into that party. I’ve lived with you for over ten years, andIcouldn’t have pulled that off.”
“I didn’t see any of that. Didn’t notice.”
“He didn’t want you to. No one else would’ve picked up on it. It was extremely subtle. He was trying to hide it. Push down how he felt about you.”
Time stops. I’m transported back to the party as I relive every interaction with Jake, trying to notice hints of what Chelsi saw. Wanting to believe she’s not mistaken. It doesn’t take more than a few seconds of replaying the party when it hits me. His lingering glances. How he quietly checked on every aspect of the setup before guests arrived. It was all right there. In front of my face, and I missed it.
“Holy shit.” A hand flies to cover my gaping mouth. “When do you think this started?”
Chelsi tilts her head, tapping one finger against her bottom lip. “Sometime between the funeral and the party. His eyes didn’t long for you at the funeral, and I would’ve picked up on it if they had.” Her eyebrows arch, a smile growing across her face. “The real question is: What are you going to do about it?”
“I don’t know. Take it slow. Figure out what I want. Consider whether a relationship between us could even work when he’s…”
“Or you could march next door, crawl into his bed, and see what happens.” Chelsi wiggles her eyebrows alongside a wicked grin. It’s exactly what she would do in this situation. Part of me wants to follow her advice. Throw caution to the wind to see if our kissing chemistry translates into other areas.
I shake my head, knowing I’m not brave enough do that, no matter how much I want to. Having sex with Jake would be a step too far to come back from if things don’t work out between us. At least, for me. A wave of nausea hits me as I think about becoming just another notch on his bedpost. Another woman he’s been with and left. Would he treat me like all the other girls he’s dated before? Could I survive if he did?
“Stop spiraling, Kate. You don’t have to fuck himtoday. I’m saying you should give him a chance and not overanalyze it.” Her eyes soften. “Let him into your heart and eventually your bed, if it feels right. You can call me anytime, day or night, when that happens.”
