“Nope. Not unless you feel miraculously better and have no questions about what you should do next.”
I shake my head. Telling her what’s been going on makes the negative thoughts I’ve been trying to bury actually feel worse. Stronger.
“Brutally honest it is,” she replies. “Brian’s acting like a fucking asshole. There are absolutely zero excuses for how he’s treating you during one of the most difficult times of your life.Heshould be supportingyou. Comforting you. At a fucking bare minimum, answering his goddamn phone when you call.” Chelsi’s face reddens, her jaw clenching so tightly she mightcrack a tooth. “These are major red flags, Kate. Ones you can’t ignore, no matter how much you want to.”
I nod and cover my face with my hand. “I don’t know what to do. Is this just one of those bumps in the road for us, or is it something more serious?”
A charged silence lasts for a full minute. My heart sinks because I know her answer before she says a word.
Chelsi shakes her head and lets out a breath. “I could lie to you and say this is one of those for-better-or-worse moments every couple goes through, but you already know deep down it’s not.” She pulls her knees to her chest as her eyes soften. “Maybe I should’ve talked to you about this sooner, but you were so happy with him. Plus, what do I really know about relationships? All I do is attract the worst type of men.”
She takes another deep breath, her eyes fixed on mine, preparing me for what I know is coming. “Brian’s great on paper. He’s handsome. Successful. Appears to dote on you. That’s why everyone thinks he’s the perfect guy, and perfectfor you. Until you start looking closer. Brian is a Monet. From far away, it’s beautiful. Up close, it’s blurry and confusing.”
I swallow hard. “What should I do?” I question, tears falling fast. “Our engagement party is coming up. We’re in the midst of wedding planning. I don’t want to make a huge mistake.”
“Talk to Brian. Share your concerns with him. Tell him what you need to feel supported and loved. See how he responds,” Chelsi answers softly, biting her lower lip. “If he’s really the man for you, he’ll put in the effort to make things better. If not, he’ll continue to ignore your needs like he’s been doing.” She sighs and releases another deep breath. “I’d like to believe this is merely a speed bump in your relationship and things will turn around quickly. Something we’ll laugh about later, long after you are married.”
“Me, too,” I whisper.
twenty-one
When I walkinto the rehab facility, I’m overwhelmed by the smell of bleach and an obscene amount of lemon air freshener. Did they place a bulk order and decide to use it all at the same time? I hold my breath as I walk through the lobby to avoid a coughing fit that would surely garner attention.
I pick up my pace, heading down the hallway until I enter my mom’s private room, and then the ambiance changes. While the facility has bright overhead lights and soft cream walls, creating an airy feeling, my mom has created a cozy oasis using a collection of lamps and piping in a faint lavender aroma that reminds me of home. She has soft blankets thrown over her bed and the recliner, and picture frames scattered throughout the room. Leave it to my mom to make her rehab room into a sanctuary.
“Hey, Mom. How are you feeling?” I ask, unpacking the salads I brought for our lunch. Although meals are included with her stay, she’s highly judgmental about their food options, insisting that Jake and I bring her in something edible for lunch every day.
“Fine.” She adjusts her position in the navy recliner, pulling up the beige chenille blanket. “Where’s Jake?” She has a tight smile and appraising eyes, waiting for my response.
Great. It’s only been a couple of minutes and she’s already irritated at me. Cannot wait to have this conversation.
“I asked him not to come because I wanted us to have time to talk privately.”
Her lips remain pressed together in a flat line as she opens up her salad container. She squints, trying to discern whether I’m telling the truth. The exact same look she gave me when I was a child.
Don’t let her get to you. Say your piece and let the chips fall where they may.
“Your case manager called yesterday to discuss your estimated discharge date in a few weeks.”
“I’m well aware of when I’m getting out of here, Katherine. What does that have to do with Jake not coming to lunch?” She puts down her fork, eyeing me suspiciously. Her eyebrows lift as she starts lightly tapping her lower lip with her index fingers. “I’m waiting.”
Talking to my mom is never easy. She’s critical of my every word choice. What’s worse is I fear she’s about to lose her shit and turn into a fucking cyclone that tears apart everything it touches when I bring up the significance of her discharge date.
Taking a deep breath and straightening my spine, I force myself to get out the words I know will likely make her explode. “Your discharge date is after the engagement party you’re hosting for Brian and me. I completely forgot about it until now. Clearly, we’ll need to cancel the party.” My body tightens as I wait for her response, knowing she won’t be pleased that I forgot a monumental event and didn’t handle rescheduling the party after the accident.
“Are you being serious?” she questions, eyes wide with shock. Her face morphs from confusion to anger. “You were raised better than this. No one cancels their engagement party two weeks beforehand unless they’re no longer getting married.”
“I—” I look down, ashamed for dropping another ball. Unsure what to say because there isn’t an excuse for me not realizing the party was happening soon. At least, not in my mom’s eyes. Not to mention, I don’t feel like celebrating my engagement when my fiancé’s behavior makes me question whether I even want his ring on my finger. “I should’ve thought about this sooner to provide guests with more notice about canceling and a rescheduled date. I can prioritize?—”
“Stop. Talking,” she demands, her face contorted in anger. “We are not canceling.”
A jolt of confusion and surprise floods my body. What is she thinking? She can’t possibly believe she can coordinate a party while she’s in rehab. This is insane.
“Do you have any idea the gossip I would face ifyoucanceled the party? Did you consider how your fiancé might feel?”
I open my mouth, but no words come out. This is not the reaction I thought she’d have.
I knew she wouldn’t be happy.
