Whatever it was, he focused on being calm and keeping his home safe.
“Hey, there.I’m sorry it was a hard day.”
JP blinked over at him.“I’m sorry I scared Petey.He just leaned wrong and it was surprising and painful.”
“He didn’t mean it.They’re both sleeping in my bed.Can I get you anything?”He felt like…a milquetoast.He felt a little like saying ‘don’t you yell at my son’ and a little like saying ‘I’m so sorry you hurt’.
“I know he didn’t mean it, and I feel like shit for making him cry.”JP sighed.“Michael gave me a pain pill – I overdid it at the physiotherapy.”JP snorted.“I was mad.”
“I’m sorry.He told me what the doctor said.That had to be awful.”
“Disappointing.I mean, they told me from the start I couldn’t expect to get full mobility back, but I guess I thought I could beat the odds.So this was… harsh.”
“Well, I—you have some options, right?You can make some decisions?”
JP shrugged.“I’m not making any decisions today.”
“Fair enough.No one should be thinking when they’re hurting.”He just didn’t know what he was supposed to do.
He was a terrible hockey spouse.
Spoiler, no one was surprised.
“That’s what Mike said.”JP held out his hand toward Ian.
Ian took JP’s hand, not sure at all what his husband wanted.
JP held on, eyes slowly closing.
He stared at Michael, who winced.
“I’m going to go check on the kids, okay?”
“Thanks.”He didn’t know what to do, but he knew when to just hold on and give comfort.“Do you want me to rub your neck?”
“Ooooh.Would you?”
“Of course.”He stepped around behind JP and started rubbing, working the heavy muscles and encouraging them to relax.
JP groaned for him.“Oh, Chou, that feels so good.”
“Good.I’m glad.”He kept rubbing, because that was better than worrying.He needed to figure something out for supper.He needed to figure out what to do with the kids to keep them out of JP’s hair when he was hurting.
“I will pay you to not stop.”
“You don’t have to pay me.”He kissed the top of JP’s head.“You gave me a family and a home.I can rub your neck.”
“It might become a full-time job.”
“Then it becomes a full-time job.”He wasn’t sure what they were going to do, but they’d do something.“You aren’t defined by hockey.”
No one could play forever.
“I have been for a long time.”
“I know.”But that didn’t matter.“You don’t have to think right now.You can rest.You’re home and safe.”
JP nodded, then winced and just said, “Yes.And thank you for that.”
