But now he does. Now he does, and ithurts.
I curl against him, offering my sympathy insilence, listening to the steady thump that marks each beat in my veins, too. “Maybe I could meet him, someday.”
His grip tightens. He doesn’t ask if I truly mean that, if I’ve decided which door to go through.
And I’m glad, because I wouldn’t know how to answer. The choice looms closer with every step—with every crunch of dead leaves underfoot, every rustle in the darkness—but I won’t know until I stand in front of those doors. Until it’sreal.
Can I really turn my back on everything I’ve ever known? On my family, my heritage, Ishanna? On everything that’s made me…mefor the past twenty-eight years?
I cling to the Shadow, my thoughts churning. I don’t know who I am without all that. What’s left over when the rules and expectations are carved away.
The night breathes around us. We breathe with it, and I sit with my thoughts for what feels like miles. Eventually, I doze, and dream, and when I wake again, the forest has changed.
Now the violet treetops of the Wildwood shimmer overhead. Before us, the castle stands atop its cliff, glowing like a beacon.
My throat spasms. It’s so close. Mydecisionis so close. Nearly upon me.
The Shadow’s breath hitches as if he can hear my thoughts. Which he can, I suppose. When I glance up, his eyes find mine, heat and hope and terror swimming there. I feel what he doesn’t say, taste it in the warmth of his skin.
Stay. Please stay.
I nearly answer him out loud. Almost give voice to the confused tangle in my chest. But before I can, light streaks across the sky, a dazzle of violet and blue, a shooting star so colorful I swear I could reach out and touch it. It arcs overhead for what feels like forever, silent and glorious, burning and burning and burning.
I trace its path with widened eyes. I feel the Shadow watch it, too, reflected in the mirror of my gaze. A memory blooms in his mind, of how he once stood at the top of the castle and hoped to someday find the same thing his parents had.
I used to wishfor you.
The star incinerates itself, leaving a blazing shadow across my retinas.
I didn’t wish for him. I didn’t even know he existed.
But maybe I should have. Maybe I should have sensed him out there, waiting.
We stare at one another for seconds, minutes. Stareintoone another, and it’s like gazing into my future. Or one of them, at least, depending on which way I go.
He finally breaks away, his brows furrowing as he stops and sets me on my feet.
I shake off my thoughts and turn to the massive cliff that rises before us. It’s the last one I’ll have to scale before crossing the land bridge that leads to the hourglass.
But to reach it, I first have to make my way across a canyon spanned by a thin beam of wood. My last trial, from the looks of it.
The Shadow frowns. “This wasn’t here yesterday.”
I take in the beam, my stomach dropping. Goddess, it’s narrow.
Then I make the mistake of approaching the edge. Nothing but darkness waits below. A fall that will kill me, if it ever ends.
“We can’t cross.” The line between the Shadow’s eyes deepens. “I’m too heavy. If I step onto that beam, it’ll break.”
I nod, already moving toward it. A hand closes around my arm, tugging me back. “That means you’re not going, either.”
I whirl to face him. “What? No. I’m not giving up this close to the end.”
His mouth flattens. “You have to. I’m not letting you fall.”
I tug my arm from his grip. A glance at my watch shows an hourglass that’s nearly depleted—I have thirty minutes, maybe, and already, the eastern sky is waking up. Dawn will arrive before the sand runs out. The Shadow willchangebefore the sand runs out.
Which means I don’t have time to argue. I don’t have time for anything but crossing this beam and scaling the cliff and breaking the curse. Because once the Shadow changes, he’ll find me in moments. He’ll appear at the hourglass, and then all he’ll have to do is come charging over the cliff.
